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Harrison Ford Is Tongue Tied By Jason Segel's Penis

By Andrew Sanford | TV | February 2, 2023 |

By Andrew Sanford | TV | February 2, 2023 |


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Talk shows are inherently weird. Guests talk through the interview with a producer beforehand and then have to do it all over again, making it seem like it was the first time. Topics are agreed upon, but occasionally, changes will be made at the moment. That adds to the natural feel. Or, in the case of Harrison Ford’s recent appearance on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, it can drive the interview to an awkward, screeching halt.

Ford appeared on Colbert’s show to promote Shrinking, a new show he is in with Jason Segel. At one point, Segel said that Harrison Ford did not know who he was before they made a show together. Ford denied that. He said he had seen Segel in The End Of The Tour, where he played David Foster Wallace. Ford also saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall. His impression of the film came down to two words, “nice penis.” When pressed on Segel’s penis, Ford freezes up.

I’ve never met a new coworker whom I had seen naked first. I can only imagine that it’s at least a little awkward. With professional actors, there’s a chance to have witnessed your coworkers in compromising positions. My sticking point is this: why bring it up if you didn’t want to talk about it, Harrison?!

What was “nice” about Segel’s penis? Was it smooth, Mr. Ford? Not too veiny? Did you think, “that’s a perfect dome?” For a moment, did you wonder if a barber could similarly prepare your pubic hair? These are the questions we want answers to! If you are going to comment on Mr. Segel’s penis, don’t shrivel up afterward. Own it! Own Jason Segel’s penis that you thought was so nice. It’s 2023, Harrison.