Mindhole Blowers: 16 Celebrity First Marriages You Might Not Know About
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Mindhole Blowers: 16 Celebrity First Marriages You Might Not Know About

By Dustin Rowles | Seriously Random Lists | May 20, 2013 | Comments ()


Like anybody, celebrities often make silly mistakes when they are young, or in the case of many, they've been around so long that they've seemingly lived two or three lives, and we've already forgotten about their first or second lives. It's a weird thing, though, these first marriages. I remember finding out when I was a teenager that my grandfather had not only been married before he met my grandmother, but that he had other kids in that marriage, and it turned my world upside down. In some cases, learning about the previous marriages of several of the celebrities below provoked the same response. What? Tom Hanks was married before Rita Wilson? Crazy. (Most people know about Jennifer Garner and Scott Foley above, who met on the set of "Felicity," but it makes one hell of a cute headline photo).

(See more Celebrity Facts.)

George Clooney and Talia Balsam

Screen Shot 2013-05-20 at 11.18.40 AM.png

Jane Levy from "Suburgatory" and Jaime Freitas (they were divorced before anyone even knew they'd been married in secret)

Screen Shot 2013-05-20 at 11.21.36 AM.png

Susan and Chris Sarandon (Honestly, I thought he was her brother, though they were married for 12 years)


Robert Downey, Jr. and Deborah Falconer (a former model, they were married for 12 years)


Johnny and Lori A. Depp (Married from 83-86. She was a make-up artist)


Woody Harrelson and Nancy Simon (No picture available. They were married for six months back in 1985)


Tom Hanks and Samantha Lewes (Married from 1978-1987; she passed away in 2002 due to bone cancer. She's actually Colin's Mom.)


Jim Carrey and Melissa Womer (1987-1995; they have a daughter together).


Harrison Ford and Mary Marquardt (1964-1979)


Daniel Craig and Fiona Loudon (1992-1994, and they had a child together)


Dustin Hoffman and Anne Byrne (1969-1980)


Bill Murray and Mickey Kelley (1981-1994)


Kiefer Sutherland and Camelia Kath (1987-1990)


Colin Farrel and Amelia Warner (for six months in 2001)


Milla Jovovich and Shawn Andrews (for one month, back in 1992)


Will Arnett and Penelope Ann Miller (for six months back in 1995)


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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Emr1970

    How about Barbra Streisand and Elliott Gould?

  • kirbyjay

    Ralph Fiennes and Alex Kingston
    Emma Thompson and Kenneth Brannagh

  • e jerry powell

    When I first saw that photo of Ann Byrne, I thought that Cher had hooked up with Maria Tallchief and made a baby.

    Oh, and Scott Foley? Way too cute for Jennifer Garner.

  • +1 for the Maria Tallchief reference!

  • e jerry powell

    You're more than welcome.

    And I was sad to hear of her passing last month.

  • Yea what a bummer! She was such a beautiful woman and a lovely dancer. I spent that night in the Maria tallchief section of YouTube being amazed once again by her dancing.

  • DarthBrookes

    Yet another reason to wish I had been born Chris Sarandon.

  • Seriously, how freaking gorgeous is Susan in that picture!

  • Jezzer

    Shawn Andrews played Milla's boyfriend in Dazed and Confused, the guy whose party plans got ruined when his parents figured out what he was up to and canceled their trip. Their marriage basically came to an end when Milla's mom had it annulled, because Milla was 16 at the time.

  • Amanda

    Don't forget Angelina Jolie and Jonny Lee Miller, they were only married for a hot minute...

  • kirbyjay

    Drew Barrymore and the first two. I think they totaled less than a year

  • Bodhi

    I had to look it up, but in the case of Milla Jovovich and Shawn Andrews, she was only 16 & her mom had the marriage annulled. I didn't know that could happen, but I guess if one of the parties isn't legally able, then it doesn't count

  • Tranjo

    Angelina Jolie and Jonny Lee Miller.

  • Ben

    The Tom Hanks one made me sad in the feelings.

  • Three_nineteen

    Hanks met Wilson on the set of Volunteers. A year or so later he got divorced. A year or so after that he married Wilson. There were some raised eyebrows but nothing scandalous ever came out about the situation. Colin's mom died like 15 years later.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Talia Balsam: Clooney and Slattery. Respect.

  • Jill

    Yes. Hot Damn, that woman must have some stories to tell. Also, if you were Mr. Slattery, would her prior marriage make you the slightest bit cocky (depending I suppose on the circumstances of the end of said marriage)?

  • Clooney's definitely grown into his chin. He's got a kind of Jay Leno thing going on in that early years picture.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Honey, Clooney has always been fiiiiine going all the way back to Facts of Life.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I should like an SRL of women who have been more successful with their husband's last name than said spouse. Susan Sarandon must be #1.

  • kirbyjay

    Demi Moore

  • Uriah_Creep

    It just wouldn't seem right to see "Susan Tomalin" in trailers and on marquees, would it?

  • Laura

    Totally thought Chris and Susan were blood related.

  • I can see that -- they've both got those yooooge, gorgeous-yet-googly eyes.

  • The Replicant Brooke

    Prince Humperdink was kind of a fox.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I cackle with glee every time Wesley orders Humperdink to sit down and he grabs his dangling sleeves before moving to the chair.

    Harry Hamlin is on Mad Men now and it's like he and Sarandon are the same person, with a little Michael Nouri thrown in for good measure.

  • Mr_Zito

    Any marriage that lasts less than a year makes no sense to me. I've never even heard of anything like that happening outside celebrity circles.

  • Arran

    I've known people who have been together a long time, then they get married and it goes to shit almost immediately. It's on odd thing.

  • Wif

    My cousin lived with her fiance for 2 years. They got married. On their honeymoon he started beating her because (he told her), now that they were married, she was his property to do as he pleased. 10 weeks later they were divorced.

  • Arran

    Jesus, that's beyond horrible. I hope she was able to get out of there long before the divorce was actually final.

  • Zen

    Forget the original celebrity post. I just want to read more of these stories.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Speaking as someone who once got engaged because we couldn't face breaking up, I understand. We came to our senses, broke off the engagement a month later, and then stayed together for ANOTHER YEAR before finally calling it quits.

    It happens.

  • Arran

    I'm mainly thinking of a guy I knew in college (he was an older student of about 30 at the time, which is important to know before you hear the rest). He had been with the same woman for a decade, had a kid and seemed really happy. He told me they were getting married, then the next semester I asked how his marriage was. It was already over. I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT HAPPENS.

  • Mr_Zito

    You all proved me wrong, but upon hearing Arran's story I just realized this happened with a distant cousin of mine: I heard he got married and when I ran into him, like three months later, it had already ended. Anyway, still don't get, it's not that I don't believe the love or whatever can suddenly go away, I just don't get how people who are willing to get married are not willing to give it more time to see if it works out.

  • ed newman

    Well, here is one way it can happen. One party believes the other will change once married. At least that is how it was for my brother, He and his first wife had been together for a few years and then got engaged. She had reservations leading up to the wedding, told no one, and went through with it on hope alone. Anyone could have told her he wasn't going to change. It lasted just over a year.

  • Carey Adams

    As a divorced man I still don't get it. I said my vows, I intended to honor them. Till death do us part, the whole deal. My ex-wife obviously did not. It only takes one person to feel trapped, disappointed, fall out of love, or what have you. No matter how hard the other person wants to honor their commitment.

  • DeltaJuliet

    A "friend" of mine got married and it lasted for less than 3 months. She kept all shower and wedding gifts, and sent no thank you notes. When I asked what happened, she said "We're taking a break from our marriage." Seriously? After 3 months?

  • KatSings

    I have a friend who got married last month and is already filing for divorce - apparently the man she married had been cheating on her for months and she found out just after the wedding. It happens. Though usually in Hollywood it's "oh hey, let's get married on a whim" and then realize that's stupid.

  • Mrs. Julien

    That is brutal! I knew someone in a similar circumstance. I can't imagine the sense of betrayal.

  • psykins

    One of the girls I went to high school with had been with this guy for about 5 years, really struggled to get her parents on board with marrying him (mostly cause her parents are assholes), had the wedding even though it was a serious financial hardship...and left in less than a year because she needed to "find herself." It happens

  • BWeaves

    Also, Tom Cruise and Mimi Rogers. Some people are still fixated on the Nicole Kidman divorce.

    I don't get how you can only be married for one month or six months. I mean, I get it, I just don't understand why some people are so stupidly impetuous.

  • Michelle

    I was JUST thinking that. The paperwork alone must be a nightmare, first to get married and then to UNDO IT ALL six months later. That's crazy.

  • carrie

    the woman with Daniel Craig on the pic is his ex-girlfriend Satsuki Mitchell (not his first wife)

    and RDJ's first wife must be brave because their marriage is basically his drug/jail years

  • pajiba

    Ooops. Fixed (kind of).

  • DeltaJuliet

    Throw me a bone and add a pic of Daniel!

  • Mrs. Julien

    He picks the right photo, he could throw you Daniel Craig's bone.

  • DeltaJuliet

    Now wouldn't THAT make my day.

  • PerpetualIntern

    Jennifer Garner is cute as a button in that cover pic.

  • latvianlady

    Looks like that pic was taken before she plumped her upper lip with plastic surgery.

  • Mrs. Julien

    It's her body.

  • Sean

    Garner is cute as a button all the time. She just sort of annoys me however.

  • Joe Grunenwald

    I heard that Will Arnett and Penelope Ann Miller only consummated their marriage right before they signed their divorce papers.

  • PerpetualIntern

    I heard she was a bit of a darer.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I don't know what "darer" means.

  • PerpetualIntern

    It's from Arrested Development. Gob's wife was "a bit of a darer" and dared him to get married.

  • $27019454

    God. I have to go back and watch Dog Day Afternoon again, just for that completely great Chris Sarandon role. I have a weird, quirky crush on him and always have. I still own Protocol on videocassette. I think it's his voice. Or the Jerry Dandridge factor. Or I'm weird.

  • $2786243

    Holy crap, that was him in Protocol, wasn't it?

    "You said it was a barbecue!"

  • $27019454


  • Sara_Tonin00

    I would guess we don't know about them because the spouses are not famous...? (with the exception of maybe Penelope Ann Miller, whom I've at least heard of)

  • Guest

    Fright Night!

  • BWeaves

    Chris Saradon was the original vampire in Fright Night. Oh gawd I had the biggest crush on him back in the day.

    I actually know of most of these marriages.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Yes, that's true - I do know Sarandon - he's also the reason Susan hit it big - she followed him to an open call, I believe, and she was cast and he wasn't. I had scrolled so far down I had forgotten him.

    But also: I thought that was the one most people knew about.

  • AlexW

    Chris Sarandon was the the non-singing voice of Jack Skellington! Come on!

  • Chris Sarandon was Prince Humperdink in The Princess Bride and in assorted other early 80s roles. He was actually pretty well known at the time.

  • ladyofargonne

    He was also in a scary movie called The Sentinel. Still scares me thinking about it.

  • jeannebean

    He was in Dog Day Afternoon, and got an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor for it.

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  • PerpetualIntern

    Humperdink! HumperdinkHumperdinkHumperdink!

  • Lizzie Gowers

    Dammit, Janet!

  • Joe Grunenwald

    I'm not listening!

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