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This Week's Eloquent Eloquence Asks: Is Appliance Intercourse Considered Sodomy?

By Prolixity Julien | Eloquent Eloquence | October 21, 2011 |

By Prolixity Julien | Eloquent Eloquence | October 21, 2011 |


Eloquent Eloquence is a compilation of the ten best comments of the week. Comments in film reviews are not eligible for inclusion.

10. Pennywise the Clown.

You listed a motherfucking, hateful, painful, godsdamned spawn of every hell CLOWN as #1?

I have to admit it’s the right decision. — The Wanderer

9. A French American (who can’t do accents) playing a Scotsman, a Scotsman (who can’t do accents) playing an Egyptian via Moorish Spain. What could go wrong?

My favourite exchange…..
Ramirez: You are Immortal!
McLeod: Why is zis so?
Ramirez: Why doesh the Shun rishe in the morning? And are the shtars jusht pinpricksh on the cloak of night?
Who knowsh Highlander…… — frank_247


8. Also, Hugh Jackman?! People, please. There are 7th grade girls whose rooms are decorated with unicorns and glitter who are manlier than that prancing sissy. — Tracer Bullet

What Tracer said, about the scotch. And about Hugh Jackman. He’s got more than a little sugar in his tank.Smokin

7. {takes MM’s Pajiba card}

{tears it apart}

{sets it on fire}

{buries the ashes}

{salts the earth where they’re buried}— TK

6. I find it kind of sad that liking your wife is “unmanly,” but concede that network tv usually defaults to the henpecked schlub / horrible bitch stereotype.

“He loves his wife? That’s so gay!” — Edith

5. I’m pretty sure any form of appliance intercourse, regardless of its sexual proclivity, is considered sodomy.

Now excuse me whilst I crucify my washer/dryer combo for living in sin. BURN HEATHENS! — Smatt584

4. Yum! But how are we supposed to watch this when it comes out? I can hardly wander casually into my local cineplex with towels and lube and just wait in line beside the little kiddies waiting to go in to Nanny McPhee 7: The Reckoning. — PaddyDog

3. This list is lame…

And if anyone should know anything about lame, it’s me. — Kenny G.

2. Didn’t he rape someone? CroatianSpaceStation

Tough one to prosecute. All the evidence mysteriously disappeared. — Bert

1. Is he pulling off a Princess Leia or is he one of Christ’s executioners? — Adrien




Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.