After Sunny Hostin roasted Amy Klobuchar alive yesterday morning, the Minnesota senator landed in a very surprising third place in the New Hampshire primary despite polling in the single digits. So with that in mind, I figured The View would be interesting today because clearly I’m the toddler who goes, “OK, this time the bright red stove won’t burn my adorable little fingers. I got a good feeling about this…”
Right off the bat, The View cemented its position in the vast neoliberal conspiracy when Whoopi Goldberg opened the discussion by announcing Bernie Sanders’ win. Which doesn’t sound nefarious until you realize that she blatantly catered to the centrist whims of her oligarchical overlords by placing Bernie’s win in context and, for some reason, discussed the other candidates in the race? WTF? Let’s be frank, there’s only one headline that should be coming out of New Hampshire, and it’s “Bernie Won the Whole Thing and Is Already President, Drink Piss.” Anything less is a cowardly capitulation to moderate constructs like “facts” and “statistical probabilities.” The Revolution will not be reality-based!
But enough of me being a sarcastic dong (about that specific subject). To its credit, the panel covered the results pretty well even while avoiding the elephant in the room, and for once, I’m not talking about Meghan — yet. There wasn’t a peep about Sunny’s showdown with Klobuchar, but there was a relevant discussion about the fact that we’re only two races in, both of them were in extremely white states, and it’s kind of fascinating how this thing is all over the map. I know the Bernie folks want to hear that he’s the only frontrunner and it’s time to bend the knee, but he’s two delegates behind Mayor Pete and barely beat him by 2% in goddamn New Hampshire. That’s insane.
As Joy Behar notes, Bernie just “squeaked by” because he’s losing supporters, which is plain as day in the numbers. Don’t get me wrong, at this particular point, Bernie is absolutely a front-runner and certainly seems to have the kind of momentum that goes on to become the nominee. I’m not disputing that. But despite an increase in New Hampshire voter turnout, which Bernie’s people like to take credit for, over 70% of that turnout went for anyone but him. If he’s the most popular candidate with the policies that all Americans want, that should not be happening regardless of the field size. He should’ve maintained a resounding lead while the moderates bring in — and God it pains the hell out of me to say this — Elizabeth Warren-type numbers. Instead, he’s neck and neck with Mayor Pete? But that’s the fascinating/terrifying part of this primary so far. Literally anything can happen. Joe Biden’s body is still twitching on the ground back at the starting line, and yet, he could mop up in South Carolina while Bernie and Pete take turns getting murdered. Or the exact opposite of that! (I don’t even know what’s about to happen to Nevada, but it doesn’t look pretty. P.S. F*ck caucuses.)
Anyway, almost everyone on The View had good points about the primary results including Meghan even though she mentioned her plagiarist husband and tweeted bullshit like this last night. Because I’m a narcissistic click-monkey desperate for attention, I went ahead and included my response.
Better than a spray-tanned rape-goblin turning America into a dictatorship one shitpost at a time.— Mike Redmond (@theredmond) February 12, 2020
Maybe worry about your own ticket, John McCain’s Money Shot https://t.co/cG6KXJNy4p
However, things took a turn when Meghan proclaimed that Elizabeth Warren doesn’t have a path forward and needs to drop out, which OK. Warren is my top candidate, but admittedly, things don’t look great. No Messiah complexes here. Also, it’d be pretty hypocritical of me to ding someone for making bold proclamations that could easily blow up in their face when that’s practically my bread and butter. Being a big dumb online idiot is in my blood! That said, I can’t imagine why Meghan suddenly has a hard-on for seeing Warren get knocked out of the race. Gosh, nothing comes to mind…
My vibe in #2020 is Elizabeth Warren finishing her thought through static interference. pic.twitter.com/KSWX7oEusG— Wʏɴᴛᴇʀ Mɪᴛᴄʜᴇʟʟ (Rᴏʜʀʙᴀᴜɢʜ) (@wyntermitchell) January 7, 2020
But the shit really hit the fan when Sunny had the nerve to say that she’s not counting Warren out yet. Now, Meghan loves to say that everyone on The View has their different opinions and “that’s what make the show so great,” but she is literally the only co-host who goes DEFCON KAREN if someone disagrees with her. From zero to MY FATHER at the drop of a hat. Not only does Meghan snottily say that, “With all due respect, we didn’t count out a lot of other candidates who dropped out,” but she ends the panel by quickly blurting out “Elizabeth Warren’s got no pathway forward!” before the commercial break. Like a spoiled brat shoving a whole cookie in her mouth after just being told “no.”
For fun — I’m definitely not using the word right. — here’s a clip from earlier in the show where the panel tackles the DOJ interference with Roger Stone’s sentencing. What’s incredible is here’s a full transcript of Meghan’s thoughts when it comes time to criticize someone besides the Democrats.
MEGHAN: [dead f*cking silence]
Except it’s actually worse than that. If you watch the clip, the discussion reaches Meghan’s turn, and she just sits there. Not one peep, and there’s still a full minute to go. Whoopi actually laughs and shakes her head that this bullshit is happening before Sunny hops in and fills the gap by bringing up Michael Bloomberg’s racism because, once again, my girl is the MVP.
Your TV job too hard, Megwad? Fine, sit there. Sunny will take it to the hole.