Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Mike Redmond | News | September 15, 2026
Taylor Swift committed the unpardonable sin of -- *checks notes* -- telling people to choose the objectively sane option in 2024, so today's news nugget should be fun for anyone who has to act like she's Cringy Satan on wheels. Audience capture is a heckuva drug.
Despite Mariska Hargitay hosting the Emmys last night, Swift went the pre-recorded sketch route and honored her royal WAG duties by attending the Chiefs game in Kansas City. For her service and sacrifice, she got stuck next to Tom Cruise, which is hilarious no matter where you rest on the Swift love/hate spectrum.
It is deeply concerning how much I would pay to be a fly on the wall for whatever these two even talked about. This pairing is about as random as it gets. Sure, Tom Cruise and Taylor Swift are both at the top of their games in their respective fields, but have you heard Tom ramble lately? The guy has become a rambler in his old age. He went on Pat McAfee's podcast for Chrissakes.
Taylor Swift and Tom Cruise together at the Broncos vs. Chiefs game.
#TaylorSwift #TomCruise
— Every Film Now (@everyfilmnow.bsky.social) September 14, 2026 at 8:57 PM
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Of course, the big question is how hard was Tom pushing the Church of L. Ron because what's even his pitch in this situation? "So listen, Taylor, how would you like to be the most successful person in music? Sh*t, wait, you already are. -- You ever thought about driving a race car in space..."
And for one more added layer, what we're obviously witness is the marketing for Digger in full effect. Taylor Swift has been making moves to nab an Oscar, so I see the play here. There are worse people to sidle up to than Tom Cruise in that pursuit, intergalactic cult aside. However, as evidenced below, Taylor should probably be aware that there's still a push to market Tom as a virile sex symbol. Which is weird, because not even Tom Cruise is pretending to care about Tom Cruise dating anymore. He's an asexual stunt robot, and that's cool. I'd be an extremely bad liberal to judge him for that. Now to see what Scientology says about the matter... oh, Tom.
