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Turn and Face the Strange: Mitt Romney's New Ad Campaign

By Cindy Davis | Miscellaneous | September 20, 2012 |

By Cindy Davis | Miscellaneous | September 20, 2012 |


After Tuesday’s release of secret video capturing a stunningly uncensored Mitt Romney, Republicans have decided to embrace the strange. A new ad campaign urges voters to “abandon hope,” and targets America’s wealthy and exclusionary voters.

Republican Presidential Candidate, Mitt Romney:

“There’s plenty of places I can go, where people believe in me.”

“I don’t need any of this. I don’t need you, I don’t need anything. I don’t need the forty-seven percent who will vote for the President no matter what. I don’t need the victims—the entitled—the people who pay no income tax. I don’t need the Hispanics or the women. I don’t need you and I don’t need anything.”

“Except…I need the wealthy people to raise millions of dollars, and that’s all I need. Just millions of dollars, and that’s the only thing I need. I don’t need Letterman, just millions of dollars.

“… And this team of extraordinarily experienced, highly successful consultants. The millions of dollars and this team of consultants, that’s all I need. “

“…And the five to ten percent of undecided Independents in the center…that’s all I need. Millions of dollars, a team and those Independents…”

“…And maybe a pre-election hostage crisis.”

“That’s all I need, millions of dollars, and this team of consultants, and the undecided Independents and a pre-election hostage crisis. That’s all I need!”

Well, what are you looking at? What do you think I am, some kind of a jerk or something?

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Abandon Hope, forget Forward, and vote for Mitt Romney, America’s Elitist Jerk.

(This ad is probably not endorsed by Mitt Romney.)


h/t asd for his GIMP skills.


Cindy Davis is an Independent nutcase.