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The Worst Halloween 'Costumes' You Can Get From American Apparel

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | October 21, 2015 |

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | October 21, 2015 |

When you’re looking for a Halloween costume, you have a number of different options. You can make something, you can buy a pre-made outfit (like sexy pizza rat! or sexy hashtag!), or you can cobble something together using clothes and supplies you already own. This time of year, American Apparel is trying to convince you to do the latter, and on their website, are giving out a bunch of ideas for super ugly costumes you can put together at home! (Considering, that is, you already own a bunch of super ugly American Apparel clothes.) For instance, you can wear this “Disco Life” outfit:


Which isn’t a bad costume. Except that it ISN’T a costume. Nope, it’s just a jumpsuit and matching spandex suit American Apparel sells as regular clothing, to be worn by regular humans any of the 365 days out of the year.


Same goes for this Sexy Cat, the most ubiquitous Halloween costume of all time.


Except again, this is not sold as a costume. This is just your run of the mill sexy cat loungewear.

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Then there are these generically named “Boys of the Sunset Strip.”


Just grab that mesh crop top you bought from American Apparel for regular daily wear, and any one of your pairs of “Shiny Leggings” and you’ve got yourself a costume.

If you have those Shiny Leggings in black (and of course you do!), you could also go the “Norwegian Death Metal” route.


“Viral Video Superstar” is actually made up of totally normal clothes. So if dressing up as Person Who Witnessed a Horrible Car Crash doesn’t seem off-putting to you, this may be the way to go.

One of my favorite things about Halloween costumes is the generic names put on them for litigious reasons. But again, these “90s Reunion” clothes aren’t costumes— they’re for normal, everyday 90s plastic-based fashion.


Speaking of horrible plastic 90s fashion made up of regular American Apparel items intended for everyday use, behold the Club Kids


Grab your leopard halters and your best PVC skirt and celebrate the one day out of the year that the American Apparel catalogue actually makes sense!