You know how sometimes you’ll be watching a movie, and a character will drop a “damn” or a “hell” or a “golly” (no, never mind, no one says that), when their mouths definitely say something much more decorous? That’s usually due to a change in the movie’s rating, like when they shot an R but had to distribute a PG-13.
According to Seth Green, Sony went to crazy lengths to turn Can’t Hardly Wait, which was intended to have an R rating into something tamer. This was a few years before American Pie, he says, and they just didn’t know how to market a raunchy teen comedy (because they’d apparently forgotten that ALL of the 80s existed).
If you look at it, you’ll see some really hilarious stuff, like when [Jennifer] Love [Hewitt] first walks into the party, there’s a kid behind her holding a balloon and covering his mouth. That used to be a beer bong, but the most expensive CG in the movie was to make it [look] like that kid was smiling and holding a balloon. And then, there’s a scene where Charlie [Korsmo] and Peter [Facinelli] are at the piano. They toast, and then they cut to a wide shot where neither of them are drinking and then cut back to a close-up of them putting their glasses down because you can’t show the kids drinking.
There’s a whole scene with Eric Balfour. He’s made pot brownies, and his girlfriend complains that you’re supposed to melt the pot in the butter. And it’s just like giant chunks of weed sticking out of the brownie, so she throws it at Lauren [Ambrose]. And then he tries to lick it off her face, and you sort of get that it’s probably drugs. But there’s so many things in that movie. Oh! [Jason] Segel’s got a watermelon that he’s filled with vodka and kept in his freezer for all of senior year, and then he brings it out to celebrate. Everybody goes for it, and it shatters on the ground. So that’s why he’s eating watermelon for the rest of the movie.
Can’t Hardly Wait was a SUPER formative movie for my little teen brain. I think my friends and I quoted that movie to each other more than we expressed actual original thoughts. So while part of me is glad that I was able to see it, thanks to the PG-13 rating, I would also KILL to see this version, which also apparently involves a lot more stoned Amber Benson. Plus, I definitely would have just snuck into the theater anyway (REBELLIOUS), so this whole thing shakes out as our giant loss. Sony, just one question for you: