Maybe it’s because time has no meaning anymore, but even now, it sure feels like Lucasfilm is still pulling bodies out of the wreckage that was Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker. On the one hand, congratulations, you made another billion dollars. On the other, at what cost? So with that in mind, I didn’t put a whole lot of stock in Kathleen Kennedy talking about Indiana Jones 5 during a red carpet interview earlier in the month. It’s not a reboot but a continuation with Harrison Ford that’s going to happen very soon? Whatever you say, champ.
Turns out, Kathleen Kennedy isn’t f**king around.
While promoting Call of the Wild, Ford has been exceptionally chatty (for him) about Indiana Jones 5, which is still a thing that’s happening and apparently very soon. According to THR, Ford has said in two separate interviews that filming will start this summer, or possibly even April, which means Disney is holding fast to its July 2021 release date, because that mentality has been working out great for them. As for what the movie is about, here’s what Ford told IGN:
“Well, I’m not going to share the story with you because that doesn’t seem like a good idea,” Ford began. “But we’ll see new developments in his life, his relationship. We’ll see part of his history resolved.”
As for what the hell that even means, I guarantee Ford doesn’t even know because, as of this writing, he’s currently blowing up Twitter with a USA Today quote that proves he’s still a master class in giving zero f**ks about these franchises. Somewhere Oscar Isaac is reading this for the first time and doing the Antonio Banderas GIF.
Harrison Ford weighs in on if Han Solo was a Force ghost in 'The Rise of Skywalker'— Culture Crave 🎥 (@CultureCrave) February 16, 2020
'A Force ghost? … I have no fucking idea what a Force ghost is. And I don’t care'
(via @USATODAY) pic.twitter.com/dVE3WseXJm
If you, unfortunately, saw Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, then you’re probably like me and not exactly champing at the bit to see another one of these things where Indy is literally pushing 80. That said, there is some good news here. For starters, there were persistent rumors that Ford could be replaced with Chris Pratt, so thank f**king God that isn’t happening. Hard pass. As for learning from the mistakes of Crystal Skull, George Lucas won’t be anywhere near this thing, which makes sense considering Steven Spielberg very publicly blamed Lucas for the dumbest parts of the 2008 film. Then again, even after he called Disney “white slavers,” Lucas is still popping up on Star Wars sets, so who the hell knows?
That brings us to the matter of one Shia LaBeouf. Back in 2017, screenwriter David Koepp told Entertainment Weekly that LaBeouf’s character will not be in Indiana Jones 5. That news didn’t exactly shock anyone because, by that time, Shia had taken several bridge-burning dumps on his early career including how disillusioned he became working with Spielberg. It got to the point where Ford bluntly called LaBeouf a “f**king idiot.” That said, Koepp’s EW interview is now three years old, and according to both Ford and Kennedy, the script is still very much in flux. More importantly, LaBeouf seems to have calmed down in recent years and has put a cork in his weird-ass “performance art” pieces. (He also instantly regretted talking shit on Spielberg.)
So could The Beef maybe have a cameo in Indy 5? I certainly wouldn’t rule it out. Does anyone even care after how bad Crystal Skull was? That’s actually a very good question, and frankly, I don’t even know why I just wrote these last two paragraphs. What was the point of all this?
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