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Touch Me, I'm Dick

By Agent Bedhead | Posted Under Career Assessments | Comments (18)



dillon3sm.jpg

Subject: Matthew Raymond Dillon, 46-year old American actor and occasional director

Date of Assessment: August 27, 2010

Positive Buzzwords: Underrated, adaptable, resilient

Negative Buzzwords: Stagnant, B-lister, old dog

The Case: In the 1980s, teen heartthrob Matt Dillon lingered on the (hopeful) lips of teen girls, who passionately plastered their bedroom walls with his hunky photo spreads from BOP and Tiger Beat magazines, everwhere. It was at this time that Dillon regularly portrayed hunky hoodlums and banging bullies in film like Over the Edge and My Bodyguard. It was also a decade during which Dillon rose to stardom as an S.E. Hinton darling who hailed from the wrong side of the tracks (quite literally, relative to Tulsa terminology) in Tex, The Outsiders, and Rumble Fish. While these movies led to a career breakthrough, they were all very similar stories with very similar characters as well. Although Dillon managed the occasional change of pace with the dramedy Little Darlings (famously taking the cherry of Kristy McNichols’ character), most of his performances to date were one-note reprisals of his usual adolescent, charismatic, quasi-gangbanger character, which obviously wasn’t a career pattern that he could carry into adulthood.

In the 1990s, Dillon began to stretch himself as an actor and escaped the confines of his previous teen-idol appeal. Quite notably, he convincingly carved out a heartbreaking drug addict in Drugstore Cowboy (for which he won critical acclaim and was recognized with an Independent Spirit Award). From there, Dillon became a standout eccentric of sorts with several memorable roles, including a thick-skulled Seattle grunge rocker in Singles and a slimy, cartoonish private investigator in There’s Something About Mary. He also participated in darker films with diverse characters, such as the high-school guidance counselor gone bad in Wild Things and the hapless, doomed husband in To Die For. Further development arrived with standout performances as a homeless schizophrenic in The Saint of Fort Washington and a former high school jock reliving his glory days in Beautiful Girls. Unfortunately, the next decade was another story altogether.

Dillon began the aughts with a misguided bang in One NIght at McCool’s, which bombed both critically and commercially but has since found a bit of a cult audience. His next project, which was seven years in the making, found Dillon making a rather unimpressive directorial debut with City of Ghosts, an unevenly paced demonstration of his inability to focus on the larger cinematic picture. Afterwards, it seemed his acting career would take an upswing following an Oscar nomination for his crooked cop in Crash (which I shan’t discuss further due to this site’s informal moratorium), but Dillon has failed to mimic the post-Academy trend of his similarly nominated peers. Instead, he’s gone on to turkeys like You, Me and Dupree and Disney crap like Herbie Fully Loaded and the much less commercially successful Old Dogs. Most recently, Dillon has taken roles as the white guy amongst black guys in Armored and this weekend’s Takers. While the latter two entries have drawn praise for his performances, Dillion could really use a bit of a refresher to return to his old movie mojo.

In conclusion, Dillon has long-since proven himself capable of self-resurrection, and he’s in dire need of another such positive surge. While the nebulous Gunsmoke project remains on the horizon, it’s unclear how successful it shall be or whether it even has a viable target audience. Perhaps losing the somewhat douchey reputation wouldn’t hurt, but — hey — if that planned fourth installment in the Evil Dead franchise ever becomes a reboot instead, Dillon would make an excellent Ash Williams. Hail to the king, baby!

Prognosis: Unfortunately, Matt Dillon’s former box-office prowess may never return. If anything, he should follow his previous method of career revitalization and box office appeal, and another stint of Broadway work (as he did in the mid 80s) would refresh his abilities as a performer along with, once again, bringing him to the attention of prominent directors. And in an entirely off-topic suggestion, Dillon should never ever again lend his scissors to Marilyn Manson because nothing good could ever come of that.

Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at agentbedhead.com.









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Comments

he would make a great Ash. not to dis bruce, but he's getting long in the tooth (and belt) and were he put in another evil dead movie, they would probably pair him up with some kid--justin long or will smiths kid. and then we'd have ten years of grumping a la star wars about our youths being raped

Posted by: idleprimate at August 27, 2010 3:20 PM

He was better in the 90s wasn't he? Well he was younger and probably liked that old gangbanger role he used to play in the 80s, but he was getting too old for it so he went in a different direction and now, look where he is...playing in crap action movies. Ah well, as is the destiny of most Hollywood male actors in their 30s-40s these days.

Posted by: ph at August 27, 2010 3:30 PM

He was good in Factotum.

Posted by: Harry Coverts at August 27, 2010 3:34 PM

Dillon got an oscar nod for -- that thing?
I remember seeing 'Over the Edge' about a year after it came out, one of the first ones I ever saw on HBO. There was a bit of a buzz about this 14-year-old kid being discovered out of nowhere and cast w/ some other newcomers; he seemed like a punk to me, as I'm sure he was, and 'My Bodyguard' and later 'The Outsiders' seemed to confirm it - I saw him as a one-note actor then.

But, starting w/ 'Drugstore Cowboy' (still got the video), he pulled off some great roles in 'Mary' and 'To Die For'.

But Matt Dillon in 'Gunsmoke'? I don't see it.

Posted by: Bill (Formerly Bill) at August 27, 2010 4:16 PM

I used to want to have sex with that man. Now I'm more focused on Jeremy Renner/Alexander Skarsgard.

Posted by: Brittany at August 27, 2010 5:13 PM

As far as the "Matt Dillon is a douche" thing goes, it was TMZ. Half the time I want to punch TMZ's correspondents, and I'm not the one they're hounding.

Posted by: Craig at August 27, 2010 5:26 PM

He was in Crash, that shall never be forgiven. Throw him to the wolves, and let neither his name, nor that of that exaggerated, ridiculously racist, and hilariously inept film about LA ever be spoken of again.

Posted by: EJ at August 27, 2010 6:49 PM

I love Singles. He was such a turd, but I loved him.

Posted by: jmflynny at August 27, 2010 7:56 PM

Crash was an amazing film. I don't care what anyone on this site thinks. You're all wrong.

Posted by: Littlejon2001 at August 27, 2010 8:46 PM

He was really hot when he was young (Tex, etc.) I LOVED him in 'Singles': How can you not laugh? I don’t wanna hear anything negative,” followed by the delusional overconfident smirk. Hee. I really do think he's very good.

Posted by: Groovy Violet at August 28, 2010 12:04 AM


I love Singles. He was such a turd, but I loved him.
Posted by: jmflynny at August 27, 2010 7:56 PM

Agreed. He was so funny in that movie. Of course that is one of my all time favorite 90s flicks so I'm biased.

Posted by: grace b at August 28, 2010 12:10 PM

I agree that Drugstore Cowboy is the shit. I used to live in Seattle in the late 80's-mid 90's. When I moved down to Los Angeles whenever I would get homesick I would watch it to kill the ache.

It's just such a spot-on representation of a certain type of a Pacific Northwest. The out of date clothes, laid-back nonchalant cool, and heavy drug use.

Heroin was so prevalent that the term Grunge came not from a marketing ploy, but from the fact that junkies don't bathe, since heroin escapes through skin pores. If they're clogged with dirt, you stay high longer. So you would escape from the constant drizzling rain into the warm confines of some shitty little bar or club, and be assaulted by the miasmic combined odor of sweat, wet wool, and severely heavy body odor cut with a little patchouli. That was The Grunge.

And speaking as someone who lived in Seattle during that time, who was a bouncer and a stagehand at a mid-sized concert theater for five years with probably some 350-odd(Very odd, I might add) shows under my belt, whose pot dealer wound up becoming part of Built To Spill, who was minor acquaintances with the first ever convicted serial killer in Washington State, and on and on and on, I can tell you one thing:

Singles can eat a big bowl of dicks.

You see, as someone much better at vocalizing Seattle's bonuses than myself once wrote: "Seattle, then and now, is a city where it is possible to be young and poor and still maintain a certain degree of dignity".

So who the fuck were all those yuppie scum dealing with existential angst in that movie? And why were they eating such a big bowl of dicks? If I'd run into those types back in the day I'da mugged them, I tells ya, mugged them!

And now I live in Los Angeles. One of the most racially and culturally diverse cities in the entire United States. And yes, it is also one of the most racially and culturally segregated cities in the entire United States.

It's not as bad as you might imagine, it just means you have to try a little harder to experience what it has to offer, and that winnows out the idiots and Annoying Fucking Hipsters to a large extent.

And whenever I run into someone who says "Crash is such a beautiful film, so full of the little and fragile truths that can bind us together", you know what I do?

I fucking mug them, that's what.

Then I go home and watch Drugstore Cowboy.

Posted by: TheUpsetter at August 28, 2010 6:27 PM

After I read this I realised I had not seen any one of those films he was in. I guess I have a strange Matt Dillon curse upon me?

Posted by: squeeziee at August 28, 2010 11:07 PM

I've never really liked the guy. He's an okay actor but just seems like a dick. So, yeah, good article title. He was okay in Singles and There's Something About Mary but that is because he was playing a moron.

Posted by: TylerDFC at August 30, 2010 6:33 AM

I don't like pretty boys.
I've never liked pretty boys, onscreen or off.
Having said that, I once saw Matt Dillon walking down 10th Avenue back in the 1990's, turned on my heel without a second thought and proceeded to follow him.
Simply because he was so damn pretty.
At a red light I took the opportunity of calling work from a corner payphone, stating I would be in late as I was currently following MD down the street. All the girls at the office said "Oh, of course, we get it, carry on". I never approached him, I simply kept about 5 steps behind for about 10 blocks before turning round again and going to work as usual.
I still have absolutely no idea why any of the above occurred. It remains my one and only stalkerish incident to date.

Posted by: cinekat at August 30, 2010 7:37 AM

Truly one of the best-looking dudes to grace the screen. Ever.

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Posted by: wholesale fashion dresses at January 5, 2011 9:57 PM

He was in Crash, that shall never be forgiven. Throw him to the wolves, and let neither his name, nor that of that exaggerated, ridiculously racist, and hilariously inept film about LA ever be spoken of again.

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