The New York City subway system is a necessary evil. It’s hot, crowded, often smelly and charged with anxiety. There are sins commuters commit against each other on the daily, like manspreading, blocking the doors, listening to music without headphones, or subjecting the whole damn car to the pungent stench of your take-out. Things have only gotten worse as hot weather and a population surge has chased more people than ever onto the already crowded cars, causing headline-snatching delays. And now Improv Everywhere has stuck their noses in to make matters worse with their “Subway Spa.”
I get it. It’s meant to be cheeky and cute! The subway can be such a den of stress, wouldn’t it be nice to offer saunas, massages, and a steam to harried straphangers? No. Because the 34th street station where this was conducted is already a steamy, stinky, trench that’s jam-packed with tourists giddy to see the Empire State Building, commuters racing to the New Jersey lines, and New Yorkers just trying to avoid nonsense. You know what they don’t need? A bunch of improvisers taking up all the seats on the platform. And if someone spritzed me with anything when I got off a train, you’d see me go full New Yorker real quick.
Also, wearing flip flops at this station is just begging to get your toes nipped by a pizza rat on the prowl.