John Oliver may have taken a week off from Last Week Tonight, but that doesn’t mean he’s taken the week off from exposing the sinister underbelly of American culture. He dropped this special web-only video on the autumnal brainwashing we’ve suffered at the hands of that all-powerful entity, pumpkin spice.
Despite the fact that pumpkin spice lattes “taste like a candle” and are “just eggnog for morning people,” we go crazy for the flavor of fall. But Oliver isn’t having it. He has a few other suggestions, if we insist on drinking our season. Things that might taste better than sickly sweet pumpkin spice, like “a cable knit sweater spice latte, or a Major League Baseball spice latte, or a keen awareness of my own mortality spice latte, because THAT’S WHAT FOLIAGE IS.”