Why are people getting so bent out of shape about this? What? It’s a bucket! It’s not like he urinated on the floor outside of a perfectly acceptable restroom. He pissed in a bucket! The owners of that restaurant should be THANKFUL. They now own Justin Bieber urine. And it was FREE. You know how much teenage girls would pay for that on EBay? They could parcel it up and sell it in allotments. Or better yet! Put it in a clear vase and set it atop a shelf in the restaurant so that people can come in and gaze upon the Wunderkind’s spitzle. The line will be out the door!
Don’t think of it as something that janitorial staff has to clean up, think of it as an opportunity! Justin Bieber has blessed this place with his sacred urine. They’ll never have to worry about vampires again.
I also love that they refer to themselves as Wild Kidz, yo! So street! So bad ass! Scorsese and Michael Mann should look into this kid. The youths are wild, yo! They’re blazing fatties, gacking fools, and pissing in buckets. Hard core.
Don’t ask me why Bieber sprayed cleaning supply on a picture of Bill Clinton and said, “F*ck you, Bill Clinton!” though. I suspect that’s some sort of gang compliment. What all the white boys from Canada who got discovered on YouTube say to each other to show their respect. “F**k you, Bieber!”
See? Respect. THuGz 4 LIFE.
← Oh Well That's Perfect Actually, Elisabeth Hasselbeck To Join The Slack-Jawed Yokels Of "Fox & Friends" | Zach Braff Flips the Script, Helps Dude Propose to His Girlfriend, Is Suddenly Awesome Again →