The cover story in this month’s Vanity Fair would like to welcome us all to “the summer of Margot Robbie.” Unfortunately for Robbie, through absolutely no fault of her own, the way the magazine’s Rich Cohen paints that summer is a scene made up of unrelenting, absurd bullshit.
The internet has spent much of its day today rightfully handing Cohen’s ass back to him. People are pissed over— to start with— the article’s oblivious condescension when discussing the naive, magical island sprites known to most of us as “Australians.”
Only 30 years until Australia gets the internet you guys!— Petra Starke (@petstarr) July 6, 2016
*sends tweet off on carrier pigeon* pic.twitter.com/fuY40rOp4K
havent had a chance to read the vanity fair piece. ive been far too busy obsessing over my soap operas and being distracted by jangling keys— Colley (@JamColley) July 6, 2016
"Australia is America 50 years ago."— Stephanie Anderson (@stephanieando) July 6, 2016
Except we have successful gun control and universal healthcare, for starters.https://t.co/CwccZjqCIG
"She is from Australia. To understand her you should think about what that means. She's upside-down like ninety percent of the time".— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) July 6, 2016
EXCLUSIVE: Photo of Vanity Fair writer doing research on Australia pic.twitter.com/8MO87yB1wx— Petra Starke (@petstarr) July 6, 2016
But it’s not just Australians he insulted with almost impressive incognizance. He’s awful to women, too! Remember when Amy Schumer totally nailed the tone of almost every profile of a young female star, as written by male interviewers?
“I’ve been doing a lot of press in the last couple of years, and I knew it would be a fun place to satirize a little.” Like how? “Well, there’s a little bit about how, when they profile a girl, it’s always right on the precipice of, like, ‘We almost fucked.’ Like, ‘She walked in, and her nipples were just a little hard, and she ordered a whiskey because her throat hurt.’ “
Yup, this is exactly that. Like, so close to being satire, but instead it’s just really, really sad.
Twitter’s been tearing Cohen apart all day for this, but let’s just let Roxane Gay do the job of a thousand tweets:
Bless Rich Cohen's hard on.— roxane gay (@rgay) July 6, 2016
"She wandered through the room like a second-semester freshman, "— roxane gay (@rgay) July 6, 2016
I mean… she's a 26 year old movie star. The only freshmen is the guy with his dick in his hand, aka Rich Cohen.— roxane gay (@rgay) July 6, 2016
"one of Scorsese’s women"— roxane gay (@rgay) July 6, 2016
"But Robbie is too fresh to be pegged" Oh man. I know he thought his pegging thing was subtle but it's not.— roxane gay (@rgay) July 6, 2016
Every issue of Vanity Fair this month comes with a thin sheen of Rich Cohen's semen holding the pagies of Margot Robbie's profile together.— roxane gay (@rgay) July 6, 2016
This is clearly terrible, but is it any better if you just change the whole thing entirely? No, it is not.
i don’t get this Margot Robbie profile at all. pic.twitter.com/gDc886RxVz— Jason O. Gilbert (@gilbertjasono) July 6, 2016
Luckily Vanity Fair also published a piece from a witness at the restaurant pic.twitter.com/WcCrIEFMcJ— kaye toal (@ohkayewhatever) July 6, 2016
Well, at least they tried.