Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Kristy Puchko | Twitter | September 6, 2016
Trump has been dominating Twitter "Moments" this past week thanks to the weirdly racist yet delicious threats of his supporters, and the epic fail of his brood to seem super cool and relatable. But the latest wave of Trump tweets began as a willfully silly conspiracy theory: #TrumpCantSwim
BOEHNER: So, I thought of something.
— Owen Ellickson (@onlxn) September 4, 2016
RYAN: What's that?
BOEHNER: Trump doesn't know how to swim.
RYAN:
BOEHNER: Think about it.
According to that dreaded Moments tab, this tweet from a political comedy account was the beginning. But the hashtag got kicked into high gear thanks to comedian Patton Oswalt, who shared a string of #TrumpCantSwim tweets with his 2.8 million followers as an appetizer, before feasting on the fetid ego of Martin Shkreli.
Why would people be Tweeting #TrumpCantSwim? Do they think that hashtag is gonna take off or something?
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) September 5, 2016
Naturally, Twitter ran with it.
#TrumpCantSwim and his kids can't be sprinkled with holy water. pic.twitter.com/KAhWvkrttm
— Crutnacker (@Crutnacker) September 6, 2016
I keep hearing #TrumpCantSwim to the tune of "Girls on Film."
— Sean Thomason (@TheThomason) September 6, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim but sources say he can stay submerged & breathe thru his scalp as his hair extends above the water like a demonic snorkel.
— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) September 6, 2016
This #TrumpCantSwim Nonsense is out of control. He's the best swimmer! The best! He graduated from @trumpUni with a degree in swimming!
— Joliet Jake (@JolietJake420) September 5, 2016
Because #TrumpCantSwim this is happening to our beaches. pic.twitter.com/gbwuYMcK05
— Jeremy Newberger (@jeremynewberger) September 5, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim because he is one of those turds that sinks instead of floats#TacoBowl
— Russell Barth (@russellbarth) September 6, 2016
It's not that #TrumpCantSwim but that water melts him.
— Sam Josephs (@SamJosephsSN) September 5, 2016
this comes up when you google trump and swim* #TrumpCantSwim
— Professor Doom (@PhD_femme) September 5, 2016
omg
i need #eyebleach pic.twitter.com/AKgFHqiSy7
He owns many pools. The best pools. Never being seen in one seems wrong, suspicious. If you don't like pools, why the pools? #TrumpCantSwim
— Fish in Pants (@TheThinGrayLine) September 5, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim but don't worry, he's taking lessons pic.twitter.com/qvDBLQ0lGJ
— RMJ (@rmccarthyjames) September 5, 2016
.@realDonaldTrump I demand you present us with your Level One Guppy Certificate from your local Dolphin Kid's Swim Club.#TrumpCantSwim
— Dan Telfer (@dantelfer) September 5, 2016
Hey girl, Did you hear that #TrumpCantSwim? Dammit, I told everyone Ryan Lochte would make the better Republican presidential candidate.
— Paul Ryan Gosling (@PaulRyanGosling) September 6, 2016
lying liberals claiming #TrumpCantSwim when he literally has blobfish for hands smdh pic.twitter.com/fveibNjswg
— Saladin Ahmed (@saladinahmed) September 6, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim but he can sink lower than most people.
— Patti Davis-Aus (@pattidavisaus) September 5, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim EVERYONE, QUICK pic.twitter.com/DjYCTJmZXR
— Eboni Jones (@eboni_ebby) September 5, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim? Honey, that grifter has been swimming in debt for decades.
— Mrs. Betty Bowers (@BettyBowers) September 5, 2016
College swim coach of @realDonaldTrump shoots down rumor that #TrumpCantSwim - "Best damn breast stroker I ever saw" pic.twitter.com/gnHlUo2jZk
— Michael (@Schmutzie_) September 5, 2016
. #TrumpCantSwim the trump-tanic won't float either pic.twitter.com/eB64JSf0K5
— TRUMP=LAST BUFFOON (@last_buffoon) September 5, 2016
Fired up Trump stumpers responded with anti-Hillary tweets, because they take ridiculous conspiracy theories way too seriously.
Who cares if #TrumpCantSwim, Hillary can't even stand up. pic.twitter.com/V8s9deZf3a
— KGB Agent Elizabeth (@MissLizzyNJ) September 6, 2016
#TrumpCantSwim? No kidding, at least he can walk pic.twitter.com/e90XZH4EwK
— Victor Nikki (@hapkidobigdad) September 5, 2016
Whether it true or not, who cares if #TrumpCantSwim.
— Genesis (@pmicc33) September 6, 2016
Then again, maybe he doesn't have to.#MAGA pic.twitter.com/V9So65Vo4m
Overenthusiastic Trump supporters that are taking this hashtag seriously #TrumpCantSwim pic.twitter.com/3rGTMquajj
— #icebearforpresident (@aphbels) September 5, 2016
But for perfection, we turn to a parody account.
This is a blatant lie. I taught Michael Phelps everything he knows. He should give me a gold medal. I always wanted one. #TrumpCantSwim
— Donald J. Trump (@realdonalbtrump) September 5, 2016
