Timothée Chalamet Brings a Giant Horse and a Lot of Weird Energy to 'SNL'

By Dustin Rowles | TV | November 12, 2023 |

By Dustin Rowles | TV | November 12, 2023 |

Cold Open — They’re doing the Republican debate, but it’s mostly Donald Trump commenting on the candidates, and because it’s slightly meta (“look who SNL has playing Ron DeSantis”), it’s slightly funnier than when they usually trot out Trump to say a lot of nonsensical things. Mostly, he’s repeating all the things that the actual Trump says out loud, which — as always — is more scary than funny. (Watch Here) (Score: 5 out of 10)

Timothée Chalamet Monologue — Now that the strike is over, Chalamet is excited that he can finally talk about his projects again, which he does in a ‘Wonka’ parody song. But then Marcello Hernandez comes out, and the two sing about having baby faces, joined later by Kenan. “I gotta baby face, but a dick like my dad.” I’m not even sure why they bothered with the Wonka song because “Baby Face” is great all by itself. (Score: 7 out of 10)

Museum of Hip Hop — Several hip-hop icons speak about 50 years of the genre, along with a streaming music star SmokeCheddaThaAssGetta (Chalamet), who speaks hip-hop gibberish about his trauma (“My dad made me get braces instead of Invisalign”). He’s obnoxious, but all is redeemed when Cornel West spanks him. (Watch Here) (Score: 5 out of 10)

Britney Spears — A peek at some of the other actors who wanted to read Britney’s audiobook, which gives the cast an opportunity to do their impressions while reading Britney “copy” — Chloe Fineman’s Chalamet is actually the best of the bunch (Chalamet himself does a mediocre Scorsese). (6 out of 10)

Gym Guy — A woman calls the gym to see if she left her bag there, and the guys who work there are idiots and don’t know how to answer her question. It’s awful on multiple levels. (Watch Here) (Score: 2 out of 10)

Giant Horse — Chalamet is a hero in a futuristic action film singing about the Thanos-like villain: Giant Horse. It’s a sequel to Tiny Horse from his last stint hosting. There’s just enough pure absurdity to make it work, although I think a lot of these skits work from the premise of: “Isn’t it weird that serious actor Timothée Chalamet is playing this character?” and for me, that’s where the disconnect lies. (Score: 6 out of 10)

Weekend Update — The “Update” jokes start slow but improve as they become more tasteless, and then an always frantic Crystal does a segment on how much work she does, even though she does not appear to have a real job. I love Crystal. She’s one of my favorite “Update” characters. (Score: 6.5 out of 10)

Sleep Paralysis Patient — Sarah Sherman suffers from sleep paralysis because of a figure she sees in her dreams. The figure can be conjured with a medical doohickey, and her sleep demon is Troye Sivan, a gay YouTube influencer. I don’t know what’s going on with this sketch. Chalamet does weird dances, and then Boygenius comes out and does the same dance, and the SNL crowd loses their mind, and I think maybe I’ve aged out of SNL this week. (Score: 5 out of 10)

Please Don’t Destroy — The Please Don’t Destroy guys encounter a man named Frank (Chalamet) who is about to jump from a building to his death. He says the only thing he has to live for is his music, and the Don’t Destroy guys asks him to play some of his music. It’s bad. But the skit is not. (Score: 7 out of 10)

Cassidy — The newest cast member, Chloe Troast, plays an orphan who no one wants, and we don’t understand why until she sings a Taylor Dayne-like song about how she hasn’t been adopted because she’s 28 years old. Chalamet, who plays the Mr. Moon, provides commentary. Did someone let Kyle Mooney back into the writers’ room? What is going on? And why do I like it? Welcome Chloe Troast! I think I’m going to like you. Also, I’m going to make this one the Mat sketch of the week, if for no other reason than it’s also my favorite and this episode is gonna make Mat feel old, too. Also, Mat may get my Taylor Dayne reference. (Score: 7 out of 10)

Calm App — Chalamet reads a sleep story for the Calm app — but the story is not calming. It’s about someone who steps in dog shit on her way to an event. Alec Baldwin makes an unnecessary cameo. They’ve done this skit before. It wasn’t funny the last time, either. (Watch Here) (Score: 2 out of 10)