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The Ten Most Inexplicably Inspirational '80s Soundtrack Anthems

By Dustin Rowles | Lists | June 9, 2010 |

By Dustin Rowles | Lists | June 9, 2010 |

Before you even get started: 1) Rocky was released in 1976, so “Eye of the Tiger” doesn’t even qualify for this list, and 2) it wouldn’t have merited inclusion anyhow because, by “inexplicable,” I mean bad. So, you won’t be seeing any Kenny Loggins on this list (Loggins’ worst songs were better than any of the ones below), nor will you see “Fame,” or any other ’80s soundtrack song that didn’t abuse synthesizers. I have no doubt that many of you actually like some of these songs, but they only worked given their context and the decade. Unless it’s a parody movie, you can’t use any of these songs anymore. Because they are bad. Very bad.

And please, do not try to justify the quality of number two. “Hit Me With Your Best Shot,” or “Love is a Battlefield” or “Hell is for Children,” maybe. But that song? No.

10. Nothin’s Gonna Stop Us Now, Starship. Mannequin

9. Man in Motion by John Parr, St. Elmo’s Fire

8. Push it to the Limit by Paul Engemann Scarface

7. Hearts on Fire, by John Cafferty. Rocky IV

6. Win in the End, by Mark Safan, Teen Wolf

5. Winner Takes It All, Sammy Hagar. Over the Top

4 Chariots of Fire by Vangelis, Chariots of Fire, Every Slow Motion Running Sequence in the ’80s

3. Holding Out for a Hero, Bonnie Tyler. Footloose and Short Circuit 2

2. Invincible, by Pat Benatar. The Legend of Billie Jean

1. You’re the Best Around, Joe Espisoto. Karate Kid

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.