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Not Like This! The 7 Most Distressing Hook-Ups Of TV's Favorite Will They/Won't They Couples

By Joanna Robinson | Lists | March 22, 2013 |

By Joanna Robinson | Lists | March 22, 2013 |

The will they/won’t they couple is a mainstay of TV sitcoms and dramas. Though the tension and energy between two people is not enough on its own to sustain a show, it can certainly ramp a pretty good show into “Must Watch” status. The question that has been picked over time and time again in pop culture blogs and (no doubt) writers rooms is when do you pull the trigger on the relationship? Do it too early and you could achieve “Moonlighting”-level of disappointment or watch something lovely descend into something unwatchable. Ahem, Jim and Pam Halpert, I’m looking at you. It’s a tricky balance and one that’s rarely done right. And I can’t be certain but sometimes, just sometimes, it feels like the writers are saying “Really? You want these two together so badly? You sure? NO YOU DON’T.” So here are 7 instances that made us cry into our Live Journal and Tumblr accounts. What’s a hapless fangirl to do? Also, there are a lot of vampires on this list. I apologize.

Buffy and Spike: Yes, fine, he’s a monster. But when they finally got together in Season 6 it was…upsetting. Buffy was feeling all hollow and shattered and, frankly, used Spike for his killer abs. Not that we blame her. Then That Episode We Do Not Speak Of happened and then it was all sort of better in Season 7. But still, during their first fight/sexual encounter when I heard that awful zipper noise I yelled “NOT LIKE THIS!”

Damon and Elena: These two are basically Spike and Buffy redux. Have we been rooting for them to get together? Yes, shamefully, yes. Did we want it to happen because Elena was sired to (essentially enthralled by) Damon? HELL NO. Damnit.

Will and Alicia: I understand they’re trying to prolong and extend the tension/love triangle dynamic but for Will and Alicia to treat their “finally” moment (and subsequent moments) as an affair that needs hiding rather than a “F*ck You, Peter Florrick” triumph? I do not like it.

Jes and Nick: I may be in the minority here but after the heat of this…

…and the excellent drama and awkwardness that ensued, I thought the writers had completely nailed how to give us what we wanted while prolonging the tension between these two. But this week’s episode was…well…what in the hell was it? The Hardware Store scene? Amazing. The drugged up sexual molestation followed by a sex/fight? I was not a fan.

House and Cuddy: It’s hard to sell us on the idea for several seasons that Cuddy is House’s match intellectually and romantically only to have their relationship train wreck so quickly. I suppose it’s in keeping with House’s character, but it just made me wish the show had ended a few seasons earlier.

Sookie and Eric: Sorry, last vampire, I promise. Eric was neutered amnesiac puppy dog when he and Sookie finally got together. Isn’t he point of Eric that he’s a dark, monstrous badass? Was anyone thrilled by him in this mentally enfeebled state? Oh, Sookie was? That’s…healthy.
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Kate and Sawyer: Two words: Fish Biscuit. This was about as degrading as it gets.

Bonus pre-disappointment:

Ser Jorah and Dany: What’s going to happen here? Nobody knows. Not even you, book readers. The showrunners are off the book map and there’s no telling what they’re going to do now, plotwise. But the odds are we Jorah Dany lovers are going to be crushed. CRUSHED I TELL YOU.