For those of y’all who keep score, before he retired to the Hall of Fame, Christian Bale — he of The Dark Knight fame — was once a fixture on the Annual Pajiba 10 List of the Most Bangable Celebrities Alive, even managing to grab the three spot the very year he got caught blowing up on the set of Terminator: Salvation. A little anger, apparently, only made the man sexier. I suppose it’s the intensity. What is confounding, however, is how much he appeals to the ladyfolks and the gaymenfolk despite the unattractive characters he plays. Let’s just say, the man does not do facial hair well.

It’s fair to say, in fact, that no lead actor is less vain than Christian Bale. Brad Pitt may grow a beard, but Christian Bale will lose 100 pounds. Oh sure, George Clooney put on a few pounds of Syriana, but Christian Bale fucking became a meth addict for The Fighter. Charlize Theron uglified herself for Monster and got herself an immediate Oscar. Christian Bale has been showing up for 25 years, putting on impressive performances, and doing God knows what to his body, and he didn’t get that Oscar until last year. He’s a fucking beast of an actor, and while he’s clearly got an acting ego, he doesn’t give a damn what he looks like.

To demonstrate, here are Christian Bale’s 9 Least Aesthetically Pleasing Characters.

Little Women

Velvet Goldmine

Mother, Mary of Jesus

Reign of Fire

Terminator: Salvation

3:10 to Yuma

Rescue Dawn

The Fighter

The Machinist

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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