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When It Comes to 'Defending' Kathy Griffin, Just Pull a Canada: A Rant

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | June 1, 2017 |

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | June 1, 2017 |

I didn’t want to write about this because I don’t care enough about this to devote a post to it, but because someone says something dumb about Kathy Griffin’s Trump beheading photoshoot on Twitter every time I open it up, I am irritated enough now that I feel compelled to do so. And the reason why I’m irritated is because the right is using the stupid photo as a weapon, and instead of simply disowning Kathy Griffin, the left keeps coming back with, “Yeah, but Ted Nugent …” or “Oh, but Sarah Palin …” What Ted Nugent or Sarah Palin said or threatened about Barack Obama is not the right argument to make. It’s irrelevant. There’s no argument to make here, because we’re not in a fight, because to be in a fight would assume that anyone is defending Kathy Griffin and we’re not, so stop it with the, “But he said!” bullshit.

Look. I’m particularly sensitive to this issue because I have five-year-old twins, and I’m not talking about the beheading photoshooot issue, because when I saw it I basically rolled my eyes and thought, “Ugh. Kathy Griffin being Kathy Griffin.” I’m sensitive to it because the twins get in quarrels 37 times a day, and whenever I try to break them up, one of them invariably says, “But she started it!” “No! She started it!” You know what? I don’t give a shit who started it. Just stop it. Both of you. You stop threatening to kill President Obama, and you stop holding up Donald Trump’s bloody head stump! I’m not defending either daughter; I’m telling both of them to cut it the f*ck out. This doesn’t have to be a stupid partisan issue unless you let it be a stupid partisan issue.

Neither one of these people were in the right, therefore, there is no need to defend either side. The thing to do here is pull a Canada. Whenever an American calls out Nickelback for being a garbage band, you don’t hear Canadians go, “Yeah, but what about Creed?” Or, “At least they’re not Bush!” Because then you’re debating each other’s cultures based on the worst examples. That’s dumb.

No, Canadians don’t defend Nickelback. Or call out Americans for their shitty music. They simply disown Nickelback. “Yeah, they suck! We don’t claim them. They’re the worst.” That’s all we have to do with Kathy Griffin. If some manic asshole on the right is like, “Look at what Kathy Griffin did! Dems are disgusting!” the appropriate response is not, “Yeah, but Ted Nugent!” The appropriate response is, “Don’t lump me in with Kathy Griffin. Fuck her!” and then walk away and roll your eyes because you weren’t really all that outraged by what Kathy Griffin did, because you don’t give a shit about a stupid ploy for attention from someone who admits they’re on the D-list. She’s Kathy Griffin. Who cares? She does not represent us, she represents herself, so there’s no need to attack the other side to feel better about yourself because you should already feel good about yourself, because you want universal health insurance and an equal distribution of wealth and access to abortion and birth control and equality and diversity, and Kathy Griffin just wants her picture in the paper.

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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