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Trumpdates: Mitt Romney Goes Both Sides So Hard a Seam Opens Up Through His Torso

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | October 13, 2020 |

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | October 13, 2020 |


11:45 — Mitt Romney goes full Susan Collins here, cowardly castigating both sides.

Meanwhile, a group of Hollywood producers got together to produce this anti-Trump ad. It’s fine, but come on! This is the best you can come up with, Hollywood? Someone get Roland Emmerich on the phone!

Elsewhere, I don’t think that Trump attacking Biden’s fitness for office is helping Donald Trump very much with the seniors he’s losing so badly right now.

9:30 — Donald Trump was back on the campaign trail last night, although because he still has not posted a negative test, no one knows if he’s still contagious. Meanwhile, he’s so ebullient right now that some are again wondering if he ever had COVID to begin with, while others are thinking he’s hopped up on steroids. People in the White House don’t even know.

Trump held a rally in Florida last night, though, and threatened to kiss everyone in the audience with his COVID lips. Something is wrong with the man.

That clown was dancing afterward to YMCA.

Meanwhile, check out Anderson Cooper’s face here. It’s priceless.

But yeah, sure, Biden’s health is the concern here.

Things are not going well for Trump, and he’s basically a cornered animal lashing out.

The dude is out there attacking Anthony Fauci, who he just put in one of his ads against Fauci’s wishes, and at this point, Fauci says that if they do it again, “they are, in effect, harassing me.” But Trump drags everything and everyone down with him.

You know how that popular maxim goes: If your vote didn’t count, they wouldn’t try so hard to keep you from registering it. Well, here’s the shot:

And here’s the chaser:

Finally, for our friends in Kentucky, I leave you this.

My November wish-list in order: Defeat Trump, defeat McConnell, defeat Graham, and defeat Susan Collins. McConnell is the longest shot, but my god, the joy I’d feel would be akin to dancing to YMCA while hopped up on dexamethasone.

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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