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The Moistening Of Tomi Lahren

By Mieka Strawhorn | Politics | May 23, 2018 |

By Mieka Strawhorn | Politics | May 23, 2018 |


Brunch is bullshit. I hate it. It’s too crowded, always takes forever, and day drinking just makes me want to nap for the rest of the afternoon. But if my next brunch outing ends with conservative firebrand Tomi Lahren getting doused with a glass of water? Well, in that case I’ll have the Eggs Benedict and a Bloody Mary, extra spicy, thank you!

According to The Blast, Tomi was out to brunch at the Union Restaurant rooftop bar in Minneapolis with her mom and and a few others. I should mention that it was a Hip-Hop themed brunch. Why Tomi and co. picked that particular spot, I’ll leave to the reader to ponder. I’ll just say I wouldn’t peg Tomi as a person who knows her Wu Tang from her Kool Moe Dee. The Blast reports:

Witness Devan Madison tells us he and a group of friends were at Union Restaurant in Minneapolis on Saturday where his friend was actually serving the Fox News pundit and her mother. He claims “My friend told me she [Tomi] was extremely rude and had a big attitude.”

Reports are that Tomi complained to staff that the patrons were “scowling at her” and so she decided to leave.

We’re told when Lahren got up to leave the restaurant, a woman sitting at Madison’s table threw a glass of water on the conservative mouthpiece. Madison claims that “literally the entire restaurant started cheering.”

Here’s the video of The Moistening of Tomi Lahren.

Tomi’s mommy, Trudi, approached the culprit and exchanged words while patrons recorded, dulcet strains of “Fuck that bitch” echoing through the air.

Tomi says she’s fine. And why shouldn’t she be? The President of The United States of America #tooktotwitter to commend her on her bravery in the face of less water than it takes to drown a chicken.

Others were less patriotic.

I’m sorry, I should have said others were MORE patriotic.