If I haven’t made it clear yet in my time on the Trump beat, let me state now, unequivocally, Donald Trump is a human disaster dumpster fire of a monster racist misogynist destroyer of worlds fuckface clownshoe dicknose assbutt douchefaucet snizzlefuck. At least.
Now that we have that out of the way, I forgot to mention that he’s the creepiest creature of them all. He cares so much about women’s skin, he’s an honorary member of the Leatherface family. He cares so much about women’s skin, every lampshade in his house should be investigated. He cares so much about women’s skin, Buzzfeed’s Andrew Kaczynski put together a video with all of Trump’s comments on the subject. And now my skin is attempting to crawl off my body like a onesie made of angry cats.
He’s like a gross Jason Mantzoukas impression of a disgusting human come to life and possibly responsible for our country. THANKS, AMERICA. GREAT SKIN.