Sydney Sweeney Is Converting to Judaism (Strap In, Folks)

Fresh off her most recent controversy involving a betting app campaign that managed to rightly anger female athletes, Sydney Sweeney has managed to cannonball her way into yet another hot topic. You clicked on the headline, so you know this one is a doozy.

For the record, in no way shape or form do I condone any sort of stigma whatsoever around the Jewish community. The internet on the other hand… where do I even begin? Anyway, Sweeney is reportedly converting as things get serious with Scooter Braun, and I’m sure everyone will be super chill and normal about this development. There’s nothing to be afraid of. *locks self in panic room*

Via Page Six:

“The couple is discussing having their own family and Scooter feels strongly on the subject,” a source said.

We previously reported that Braun is planning to pop the question within the next six months.

We also reported that Sweeney was spotted attending Rosh Hashanah services with the mogul at Temple Sholom in Greenwich, Connecticut.

When the betting app debacle dropped, Jezebel posited that Sydney Sweeney is a professional troll, which does have very some strong evidence after the whole jeans fiasco. Do I personally think Sweeney is a troll? No. That would require way more introspection and knowledge of the world that has not been present. Is someone on her team fully aware that controversy equals a buttload of eyeballs? One billion percent.

That said, I feel extremely comfortable saying Sweeney converting to Judaism is exactly what it looks like: One partner exploring the other’s religion before starting a family. I would bet cash money Sydney Sweeney doesn’t even know what Gaza is, and there’s nothing insidious here. Do I love Braun’s alleged stance on the topic? Obviously not. You folks know me. I’m not a religious guy after having evangelicalism shoved down my throat, so this isn’t how I would roll. If a woman I have absolutely no business being with hasn’t wised up and ran for the hills yet, you won’t catch me rocking that boat. Call me old-fashioned.