HBO Max Has Botched the Scheduling of 'Welcome to Derry'

It’s October 22nd, and I should have already ventured to Derry, Maine, at least two times. My skin should have crawled at the return of Bill Skarsgård as Pennywise. Then, if that wasn’t enough to hold me over, I could venture over to my local cinema and see Sinners in IMAX, riding the Spooky Season wave until Halloween. But I’m dealing with Warner Bros., who have no idea what they’re doing.

I am well aware that they are currently trying to avoid a hostile takeover. It’s no mystery to me that I can enjoy horror movies and shows when it is not the designated season. But dagnabbit, if companies are going to lean into the trend of releasing scary stuff on a seasonal basis, then they should ride that through the whole season, not the last ****ing week. Give us time to enjoy them out in the open as a society before Mariah Carey emerges from her cave!

The first episode of IT: Welcome to Derry premieres on October 26th, so the second episode will air in November (barring some special day-of-Halloween drop, which, if that happens, I want all the credit). That, to me, is unacceptable! I should be getting my fill of that scary clown all month. Anyone who has HBO with ads may be subjected to a Christmas commercial halfway through their viewing. Hogwash!

But that’s not the only way ole Michigan J. Frog has misunderstood the Spooky season! Sinners will be seeing a re-release on IMAX, and thank Zod for that. Thank him for Welcome to Derry, too. I am genuinely excited for both. It’s the release date I have an issue with. Sinners returns to IMAX on October 30th and will be there for a week. Why?! There will already be Valentine’s candy in Walgreens at that point!

I think there’s an argument to be made that, with Sinners specifically, they’re shooting themselves in the foot. There’s a chance, laughable as it may be, that Tron: Ares has a stranglehold on IMAX screens until the 29th, giving it about three weeks of floundering. That would be hard for WB to get around, but doing so would make a significant difference. People want to do Halloween stuff now, not on November 3rd!

Many Octobers of my childhood were spent consuming spooky stuff for most of the month. If it wasn’t movie marathons, it was Simpsons Treehouse of Horror reruns airing every weeknight as soon as the calendar hit OCT. Burger King would start busting out monster-themed kids’ meal toys as soon as they could. But this isn’t a “back in my day” complaint, because BK is still holding it down. I could buy vampire nuggets as early as two weeks ago, and I know that, cause I did. Thank you for your service, King.

The thing that feels even crazier to me is that there’s more of a market for coverage than ever! Sure, there will be some hype around the Welcome to Derry premiere this weekend, but imagine if we were already halfway through! For an eight-episode season, it’s safe to say that things would start popping off (as the children say) by episode four. Or, hell, what if they started in September?! Imagine the finale airing on Halloween weekend (even if it’s ruined by November)! It was right there, Zaslav!

There’s also built-in proof that that might have worked. Both IT films were released in September, and both made back their money and then some. The first film became one of the most successful horror movies ever released. Chapter Two did not fare as well, but that’s society’s fault, not the movie’s. September has often been a successful dumping ground for horror, so why not use that month to kick-start the season?

Yes, I can and will continue to watch Welcome to Derry, despite the season ending as it airs. But I grew up during a time when liking horror stuff all year round was niche or weird. Same with comic books. A lot has changed, and it’s nice to have something I love be more accepted on a grand scale (capitalistically driven as it may be). I love that there’s a spooky season and that people in power are trying to appeal to it. I just want them to use their friggin brains and cover the zone!

Let it all out! Air Welcome to Derry all month, so we have no choice but to watch the rest of it as it airs. Re-release Sinners in a normal format until the end of the month and then pivot to IMAX. I’ll go twice! And don’t stop there! Drop The Shining in theaters. Have special screenings I can pay for where I don’t even know what’s playing, just that it’s a Warner Bros. horror movie. I’ll go, and I’d bet money that others would as well.

David, I know you’re reading, so please, whoever’s in charge next year, be it Comcast or that Ellison dude whose face consists mostly of teeth, let them know us spooky folk will be there for a month-long rollout. Don’t let him waste the opportunity, David! It’s too late for you, but others may have a chance!!