Will Forte Is All of Us, But Also Insane
These first couple weeks of 2016 have been kind of intense for a lot of us. We’ve lost some people who were very important and influential in their fields, and we’ve come to the slow, sad realization that all the fun parts of winter are over and all that’s left to look forward to are months of darkness and cold. And Valentine’s Day. Which can somehow be worse than just the dark and cold. But this is definitely not the way to communicate your psychic turmoil to the world:
This is a bad idea. Do not do this. Whatever temporary enjoyment you get out of observing people’s shock and surprise is not worth the MONTHS it will take to get your hair to look normal again, even if he shaves the other half of his head immediately after the event. Especially that eyebrow. That eyebrow will never be the same again, Will Forte. But the MOST alarming part of this is that one of his arms also appears to be shaved which gives me grave concerns about just how far he took this joke.
It’s a long weekend here for many of us United Statesians. Whatever you do, do not get bored and antsy in sight of a pair of clippers. Not even if you can convince a friend to do it with you.
Use this space to express yourself instead. Thank you. And let’s all keep Will Forte in our thoughts, and hope that someone in his life was able to pull him aside and ask him if there was anything he needed to talk about.