Yes, this post is about Donald Trump, and yes, the actual appropriate time for Donald Trump to have stopped talking was so long ago, I don’t even know if there was an actual date. It’s just always been there, a fact of life, a natural element of the universe. Evolution, Newton’s laws, and Trump needing to shut his face.
Still, Trump’s idiocy may have reached its next summit, now that Fox News, the network that destroyed the word “fair” like Millennials destroyed “literally,” has shut the man down over his use of the word.
The next GOP debate is this week, hosted by Fox’s Megyn Kelly. Today, Trump posted this video to his Instagram:
If you don’t feel like listening to Trump’s face hole spew word sounds, here’s what he said:
Megyn Kelly’s really biased against me. She knows that. I know that. Everybody knows that. Do you really think she can be fair at a debate?
This comes after a CNN interview that aired Monday night in which Trump discussed how Megyn Kelly is super duper unfair to him, like a big blonde bully.
I mean, I don’t like her. She doesn’t treat me fairly. I’m not a big fan of hers at all. I don’t care. She was—she probably was—I might be the best thing that ever happened to her. I don’t know, because who ever even heard of her before the last debate?
He insisted that he wasn’t going to do this week’s debate if he’s going to be treated so unfairly, and also added this super creepy message:
You know, after the last debate, I went up 11 points in the poll. They’re good for me, but I don’t think she can treat me fairly, and I’m not a big fan of hers. Maybe I know too much about her.
The network responded in the only way it could have: by calling Trump a scaredy cat.
Sooner or later Donald Trump, even if he’s president, is going to have to learn that he doesn’t get to pick the journalists — we’re very surprised he’s willing to show that much fear about being questioned by Megyn Kelly.
But then— and yes I do feel a little dirty by liking something Fox says this much— they doubled down with this statement.
We learned from a secret back channel that the Ayatollah and Putin both intend to treat Donald Trump unfairly when they meet with him if he becomes president. A nefarious source tells us that Trump has his own secret plan to replace the Cabinet with his Twitter followers to see if he should even go to those meetings.
Now if Megyn Kelly can just stop being so racist all the time, maybe we can finally really like her.