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Notorious RBG Hospitalized After Cracking Three Ribs

By Dustin Rowles | Miscellaneous | November 8, 2018 |

By Dustin Rowles | Miscellaneous | November 8, 2018 |


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Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg was hospitalized with three fractured ribs after falling in her office on Wednesday night. She experienced discomfort after she got home last night, and checked herself into a hospital for observation and treatment.

What are you doing, RBG? Why aren’t you in a protective forcefield? Why aren’t covered in bubble wrap? Why aren’t you working with Dick Cheney’s doctor? Or the people responsible for Robocop? Or Tony Stark?

I bet she was exercising again. She’s always exercising. That’s what your interns are for, Justice Ginsberg. Make them exercise for you. This is terrifying. WE CANNOT LOSE YOU. Your 85-year-old heart is keeping America alive.

We adore you. We love you. You are a national treasure. Please be careful. Maybe install some foam rubber flooring and buy a desk made out of Nerf material. Hang in there, RBG. Best wishes. Get well soon.



Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.


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