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Kellogg's Latest Cereal, 'Totes Amazeballs' Is, Well, Totes Amazeballs

By Dustin Rowles | Miscellaneous | February 22, 2012 |

By Dustin Rowles | Miscellaneous | February 22, 2012 |

Cute story. The lead singer of the Charlatans, Tim Burgesss, explains: “I heard someone use the expression Totes Amazeballs, and it sounded like something from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I sent a cheeky tweet saying I’d invented a new cereal and that Kellogg’s were interested. But within an hour they’d got in touch.”

So, Kelloggs — proving Mitt Romney right about corporations being people, people with feelings, and with a senses of humor, if not delightful sweet tooths — designed a cereal specifically for him. Alas, there is only one box, a combination of Burgess’ favorite things: Rocky Road cake, Coco Pops Rocks, marshmallows, shortbread pieces and raisins.

The raisins I could do without, but otherwise, it sounds like a spectacular cereal. Put it on the market, Kellogg, but drop the “They’re Schweet” tagline first.


Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.