Genderswapped King Arthur Rebooted IRL
Cue the chorus, sound the trumpets. For a child has pulled a sword from a lake, and if Monty Python’s Holy Grail has taught me anything, it’s that the monarchy is based on people pulling weaponry from water. So, who cares about the upcoming royal baby? Clearly seven-year-old Matilda Jones is destined to rule the realms of the United Kingdom!
On holiday with her family in Cornwall, Matilda Jones was wading through a small lake called Dozmary Pool, when she spotted something glinting at its bottom. It was a sword, four-foot-long.
The Mirror reports, “According to local folklore, Dozmary Pool is the spot where King Arthur returned Excalibur after being fatally wounded in the Battle of Camlann.” Matilda’s father told this story to her as they visited the pool, recounting how the Lady of the Lake reached a hand out of the once seemingly bottomless water to receive it. So, when waist-deep in the pool, Matilda called out that she saw a sword in the water, he thought it was an overactive imagination. “I told her not to be silly and it was probably a bit of fencing,” Paul told the press. “But when I looked down I realized it was a sword. It was just there laying flat on the bottom of the lake.”
this picture of Matilda Jones makes me smile. pic.twitter.com/QhS1fun480— chinacatmoonflower (@chinacatmouse) September 5, 2017
Paul insists the sword is not an ancient artifact, but probably a film prop. But Paul was wrong about the sword once already. Shockingly, The Mirror didn’t bother to get a quote from the UK’s new wielder of Excalibur. Nonetheless, Twitter is ready to embrace Matilda Jones as the one true ruler of the island nation.
OK this girl now rules Britain. Those are the rules. There are books about this. Send her to Number 10 immediately. https://t.co/ebTC3QQaCL— TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) September 4, 2017
all hail the one true queen, matilda jones, first of her name and ruler of men, sword seeker and mother of us all— bee @LOVELY gaston🌟 (@YUUBARU) September 4, 2017
Clearly, Matilda Jones needs to be the true and rightful King of England.— Richard Gant (@gant_richard) September 5, 2017
Even if the sword found by Matilda Jones was just a prop and not #excalibur, can we just crown her queen anyway and refresh our leadership?— Dodgy Cur (@dodj_defur) September 5, 2017
Just sayin', "Matilda Jones" is TOTALLY the name of a girl who grows up to be queen. Of the galaxy.— Matt B. (@tederick) September 4, 2017
fanart of rightful heir to the throne kid pic.twitter.com/isuEz2qmvr— jessica 🍞 (@my2k) September 4, 2017
Go to The Mirror link above for more pics of Matilda and her sword.
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