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Asshole Throws Surprise Party to Catch His Asshole Wife Cheating On Him

By Dustin Rowles | Miscellaneous | February 26, 2015 |

By Dustin Rowles | Miscellaneous | February 26, 2015 |

There’s a story going viral now (via Paultera), about a guy who threw a surprise party for his wife — knowing that she was cheating on him — and invited along his wife’s friends and family with the intention of catching her in the act. Basically, he knew she was cheating on him, so over her birthday weekend, he told her he was leaving town, only the morning of her birthday (at 8:30 a.m.), he gathered up a posse to “surprise her.”

“I put my key in and unlock the door; we all sneak in and make our way down the hall towards the bedroom. Each holding a kazoo and her mom holding the cake grinning from ear to ear. Well as I throw open the door, we all yell surprise! But the surprise was on us and there was my wife, butt naked with her lover staring at us wide eyed. Mom drops the cake, sister screams, father begins to shout. I pretend like I’m horrified to which her friends try to push everyone out while yelling at her.”

“My wife, excuse me, ex-wife is sobbing and screaming how could I while the lover is desperately trying to put his pants on while running out of the place.”

“Needless to say, it was one of the best birthday presents I have ever given.”

I’d just like to say congratulations to this fine fella! He humiliated his wife, but more importantly, he horrified her innocent parents. No revenge plot is perfect unless the mom drops the cake, the sister screams, and the father begins to shout!

Good for you, guy! Because I’m sure that there’s no reason at all that your wife decided to cheat on you, because you sound like a swell fella who understands the value of thoughtful communication. Who recognizes that a conversation about the inadequacies that drove her to another man would be pointless.

But I guess I still feel a little sorry for the guy. I mean, he got cheated on repeatedly — hell, his wife would rather spend her birthday with another man than her own husband — and all he got out of it was a story he could anonymously share with the San Francisco Globe. Poor guy. I don’t think he even understands that he’s basically bragging about being cheated on.

But I’m sure he feels like quite the man now because he embarrassed the woman he married in front of the man she had been fucking behind his back for months. And good for him for ending a marriage with a woman that clearly had no desire to be with him anymore.

(I’m sorry. I know that cheating sucks, but this dude’s story just really rubbed me the wrong way.)

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.