I don’t know a lot about Miranda Lambert, but I know that if you pick a fight with her friend at a restaurant, she will have no problem dumping an entire salad on your dining companion. Thems the breaks right there.
I dunno, when Dionne Warwick sang about what friends are being for, I’m not sure this was on the menu? Maybe it was a deleted verse. Here we are though. You now know Miranda Lambert is ride or die, and is not some fair weather friend like Garfield who values food above friendships. When push comes to main course, she’s down to throw down…literally.
So here’s what happened, according to People, so you know it’s sanitized and celebrity-blessed. Miranda was dining at a steak house with her mom and a friend. The friend went to the bathroom, and some “older man” (People’s words, not mine) made a comment pertaining to millennials and their phones to said friend, and yada yada yada, Miranda throws a salad on the older man’s wife.
Miranda’s mom isn’t my mom, but I can tell you my mom would have been mad at me for wasting a perfectly good salad and would have preferred I dumped water instead. You can replace a glass of water, a good salad is worth its weight in someone more expensive than salad (although come see me in 2022, when we’ve devolved into a Tank Girl-style water wasteland.)
So is it ever OK to throw food? I mean, I’m of the opinion that grownups shouldn’t throw things period. You hold your rage and hash it out on daytime television like God intended. That’s how adults settle things. We don’t waste food, because food is good! It keeps you alive, and pizza is also food. How can pizza ever be bad (except for the notable exception we recently covered.)
So in summation, don’t cross Miranda, and maybe keep your rude comments to strangers in your pocket, unless you want your wife to get a salad dumped on them.
Header Image Source: You Tube/ Miranda Lambert