This is why I hate April Fools’. For one glorious moment, everything was wonderful. Now it’s ruined.
On April 1, in the comments of this post, commenter sarah_jwh needs a nap posed one seemingly simple question: Is this an April Fools’ joke? And she linked to a website that would take over my entire day: a lifestyle blog courtesy of the Artist Formerly Known as Rainbow Killer, Katherine Heigl.
And it was good.
There were two possibilities here: 1) this was a genuine effort in full earnestness, and you know we hate that around here; 2) this was a masterful joke mocking Gwyneth Paltrow, Blake Lively, and all the other celebs who’ve gone full Goop.
Because it had to be. It was TOO GOOD.
Ostensibly, the site had been around for several months, but she only started promoting it on March 31.
And the retweets of her fans were so stoked, so jazzed, so downright on board, it seemed impossible they could be the work of anything but people in on the joke.
Then there’s the fact that this is literally the title of one of her recent posts:
So it had to be an April Fools’ joke. It had to. Katie Heigl, known for being a somewhat dour, ungrateful snarkstress—for better or worse—blogging about living her most #authenticlife on her #ranch like Socality goddamn Barbie? Consider us all #blessed.
But, alas, it was no joke. It’s apparently a totally real thing.
Rather than giving us the most hilarious joke of all, so perfectly and delightfully mean without actually being offensive (because what’s Goop going to do? Not be Goop? THAT IS HER #AUTHENTICLIFE) we instead learn that, likely in an effort to reset her public persona, Heigl is going full Pioneer Woman and trying to be one of us, shilling cat litter and blogging about jam.
Like My Father the Hero, this is awkward.