Jenny McCarthy Says Playboy Mansion Parties Were Full Of 'Hot Women' And 'The Ugliest Dudes': 'Viagra Central'

Today in “No sh**, Sherlock”, former Playboy Playmate/TV host/actress/extremely harmful anti-vaxxer Jenny McCarthy is talking about how the Playboy Mansion was actually pretty gross in the nineties.

This week, Donnie Wahlberg’s wife of nearly ten years was on Watch What Happens Live, and host Andy Cohen asked her what she remembered from her Playboy days. Jenny replied that her experience was “positive” because Hugh Hefner “was married at the time.”

51-year-old Jenny revealed that she was repeatedly asked to be a part of A&E’s takedown documentary, Secrets of Playboy, which explored the dark side of Hef and his empire (drugs, trafficking, sexual assault, emotional and sexual abuse, murder, suicide, etc.), but she refused them because she “just didn’t have that experience.” Jenny said it was the same for Pam Anderson: “We were at a different time I think … I was there when his kids were throwing bacon at me in high chairs.”

But just because the Grand Elder-Perv was married and on his very best behavior (at least in front of his most famous Playmates), it didn’t mean Jenny didn’t encounter lecherous creeps:

“There was still so much sex going on with gross celebrities in the grotto areas and stuff like that. I went to the parties. So I got to see a lot of that action.”

Andy asked Jenny what the “vibe” of these parties was, and she replied that the men were in “heaven”: “For every twenty guys, there was one girl.” Wait, wouldn’t that be a bad thing? Too Many Dicks on the Dance Floor and all that? Andy was also confused, and asked, “How were the guys in heaven? There were too few girls.” Jenny explained:

“Because there was only hot women and the ugliest dudes. So if you were like somewhat good looking … *snaps fingers* Oh God, they were like, really really old. It was like Viagra central, you know?

Someday I can maybe tell the funny stories of it all. Like girls hunting for Hef in the middle of the night, when he was married. And I’d be like, ‘What are you doing? Stop it!’ Or girls hot-waxing their poon, and I’m like, ‘What’s happening, I just came here from Chicago! I was just working at a Polish grocery store only yesterday and I’m walking into this chaos.’”

Jenny said she’d been working at the grocery store for seven years before she got Playboy. She was ringing through a customer’s Playboy magazine, saw Anna Nicole on the cover, and thought, “I can do that.” One day, she went to the Playboy building in Chicago to try her luck:

“I said, ‘How do people become Playmates?’ They go, ‘They don’t walk in. You have to send a photo.’ And I was like, ‘Alright, bye!’

I was waiting for the elevator, and the editor walked by, and he said, ‘We have a photoshoot, you wanna just throw on a bikini?’ And I said OK. This is a true story. And then I thought, ‘I didn’t shave. This is bad.’ Cuz I was just gonna get information.”

Jenny said she did the shoot, posed like she was doing “a mug shot”, and took the bus home: “By the time I got home, there was a voicemail on my answering machine that said, ‘We wanna test you for Miss October.’” She got the gig, and, the next year, she was 1994’s Playmate of the Year.

Here’s Jenny on WWHL:

Listen, Jenny McCarthy is always gonna be on my sh**-list for the whole “vaccines trigger autism” thing, but I am glad she doesn’t feel traumatized from her Playboy days. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for Hugh Hefner’s widow, a bunch of his ex-girlfriends, and the countless young women who were abused at the Playboy Mansion.