Elon Musk spent a lot of the past few days being Extremely Online, tweeting billionaire bullsh*t about the coronavirus lockdown and posting yet another incomprehensible rant that saw $13 billion wiped off the value of Tesla’s share price. Don’t worry, it bounced back. Capitalism, baby.
Last night, he was angrily tweeting at @CleanTechnica about how the EPA was denying claims that testing on the latest Tesla Model S was faulty. Oh, and then he revealed to a replying fan that his girlfriend, the musician Grimes, was in labor. Is that multi-tasking? How nice to know that he keeps on top of priorities while his love is pushing a whole human out of her body.
Mom & baby all good— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) May 5, 2020
He then tweeted a couple of other replies to reveal that the baby had arrived.
This is Musk’s first child with Grimes, who he has been dating since 2018. He has five children with his first wife Justine Musk, as well as one late son who died of SIDS. After divorcing Justine, who wrote in agonizing detail about how much her marriage to Elon sucked, Musk married actress Talulah Riley in 2010. They divorced in 2012, then remarried a year later, and then divorced again in 2016.
When asked what the baby’s name was, Musk said… Well, just take a look.
X Æ A-12 Musk— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) May 5, 2020
How do you even pronounce that? My sympathies to the poor Starbucks worker who has to scrawl that on a cup. I feel like, if you manage to successfully say this out loud, a portal to the seventh layer of hell as described by Dante may spontaneously open up. That or your Roomba will gain sentience and start the long-awaited robot revolution.
Here’s the thing: This is probably a joke but with Musk and Grimes, it’s honestly hard to tell. Musk has committed himself so thoroughly to being the absolute worst these days, a social media troll who is nowhere near as self-aware as he thinks he is, that he could make any bullsh*t announcement and we’d be like, ‘Yup, seems legit.’
Let’s just hope that Musk treats Grimes better than he did his first wife.
Header Image Source: Getty Images.