Willem Dafoe is one of the most authentically talented actors out there and can do creepy and menacing better than most of the other so-called “villainous types” out there. Even his take on Detective Kimball in American Psycho was such a finely tuned, nuanced performance that we could perfectly understand the paranoia he instilled in Patrick Bateman. It’s just such a pity that Dafoe, like many other competent actors, has made his share of crappy movies too. Here are the top eleven selections:
The Boondock Saints: Even those who love this movie can admit it was pretty crappy (and don’t even get me started on the gratuitous shower scene of All Saints Day). Still, who knew that Dafoe had legs that just won’t quit?
New Rose Hotel: Sure, this movie boasted Asia Argento’s bod, but it also contained far too many flashbacks to sustain any sort of intelligence.
Spider-Man 3: Screw you, Emo Spidey.
The Clearing: This could have been a compelling dual take on the American Dream if it weren’t so damn boring.
Manderlay: What’s up with Dafoe and Lars von Trier? This one is the crappiest of all their collaborations.
Anamorph: This movie had fine cinematography but was such a disappointment for horror fans.
Body of Evidence: Exactly how much did Dafoe get paid to endure the hot wax scene with Madonna? Not nearly enough.
The Flight of the Intruder: This one had so many glaring continuity errors that it was impossible to take seriously.
Speed 2 - Cruise Control: This movie is yet another sequel that should’ve never happened.
American Dreamz: Maybe I just didn’t “get” the satire, but I felt sorry for Dafoe’s character as well as the man himself for appearing in this nonsense.
Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant: Wasn’t this supposed to be the next Twilight Saga? Such a low bar can only be missed by a truly crappy movie.
Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at Celebitchy.