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The 11 Least Punchable Faces On Television

By Dustin Rowles | Seriously Random Lists | July 26, 2013 | Comments ()


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We here on the Internet like to write posts about the most punchable faces because it's fun, it allows us to vent, and really, honestly, some of those faces are really punchable. But what about the flip-side to that? The television characters you could never punch. Because they're too cuddly? Or their teddy bears? They're like human puppies. How could you punch them? YOU COULDN'T. They're not punchable faces. They're awwwwww faces, and here are the 11 cuddliest.

Andy Dwyer

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Annie Edison

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Jim Harper

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John Bennett

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Fat Schmidt

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Marshall Eriksen

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Arya Stark

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Stan Rizzo

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Saul Berenson

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Buster Bluth/Gary Walsh

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Alex Kerkovich

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • Horatio Postlethwaite

    I think the Dog would disagree with you about Arya Stark.

  • Haystacks

    I wish fat Shmidt was my boyfriend. He is so sweet. That said, are there no likeable people of color on TV these days? That is so depressing

  • Guest

    "You're black, he's probably already scared of you."
    "Yeah, but you're gay and chubby, he'd never see it coming."

    Too soon?

    PS. How is Brad not un-punchable? Explain that to me.

  • socallmeshirley

    Sorry, but I'm taking issue with John Bennett not being punchable, because I find him EXTREMELY punchable.

    ***ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK SPOILERS***

    Are we actually supposed to be rooting for him and Daya? I suppose being cute-ish and not having a creepy pornstache makes one a viable romantic lead. But I find his relationship with her terribly creepy. He abused his position, was completely unprofessional, and apparently doesn't know how to use a condom when illicitly screwing an inmate. UGH I hate John and I would punch his face so hard.

  • As far as least-punchable faces goes...somebody I always thought qualified was Zach Braff. As much as I dislike every single character Zach Braff has ever played, I still don't know that I could really punch any of them. It'd be too much like hitting a woman, or a toddler.

    You're right on Marshall Erickson, though. He's the only one out of him, Ted, and Barney that doesn't deserve a thorough ass-whippin'.

  • Helo

    I wouldn't punch Marshall Eriksen, but I would slap him pretty damn silly.

  • Orleanas

    I disagree with Annie Edison: She is truly punchable. I wholly agree with John Bennett: He is sweet.

  • Cree83

    God help me, I sometimes want to punch Annie into next week. I don't think I could punch Shirley though, even if she was trying to convert me.

  • Alwyn

    I agree completely. I wouldn't even punch Britta (because I Love Her), but Annie can rile me up something good sometimes.

  • Chinaski

    Oddly enough, the picture you've ran of Jason Segal DOES want to make me punch him. He looks like a smug douchebag in that photo.

  • Green_Eggs_and_Hamster

    I would definitely punch Buster, especially if he were my brother.

  • Mary

    I would punch Marshall Eriksen in the face... with my vagina.

    Jason Segel's on my Freebies list for a reason!

  • Captain D

    I feel as though anyone who would not punch Alex Kerkovich in the face has probably never seen seasons one or two of 24

  • It's not Allison Brie's face that makes me want to punch her in the face--it's her voice. She's so screechy, even on Mad Men. I couldn't deal with Trudy any time she showed up, her voice was so grating.

  • psykins

    I saw an interview with her for Paul F. Thompkins' youtube series, and her voice was surprisingly deep. Maybe she does the screechy voice for her characters?

  • Bodhi

    Speakeasy is SUCH a great series!

  • socallmeshirley

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

    It's pretty close to this, sometimes.

  • Tinkerville

    I was nervous to admit that despite being a fan of Community, I would very much like to punch Annie Edison. Apologies, Pajiba. It's a combination of the voice and how grating they made her character.

  • Jezzer

    Why in the name of whatever god or goddess would you apologize for having an opinion that runs counter to the herd?

  • IngridToday

    Especially when her character resorts to whining or crying.

  • L.O.V.E.

    I could never bring myself to punch Alex. Now, some playful wrestling ....

  • IngridToday

    Early Stan is very punchable, new Stan-never

    I would punch/slap Bennet.

    *spoilers*
    His relationship on the show is based on a girl he barely knows, who has no real time to develop a healthy relationship, in addition to the issues of power/authority he holds (which may be a part of the girl's attraction).

    He needs a real good "what the fuck were you thinking, here's five fingers of common sense" slap.

  • BWeaves

    I agree on Stan.

  • stella

    No Jesse pinkman?

  • emmalita

    He was disqualified, his face was punched several times.

  • J.P.

    What, no Castiel?

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Oh gods, punching Castiel would be like punting puppies, indeed.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    As long as I don't have to see Jason Segal naked EVER again.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Oh, sorry. You are so, so wrong about Annie Edison.

  • stella

    Seriously. She's just MEAN sometimes.

  • Monica

    I would probably punch Annie.

    I would also probably punch Arya. She reminds me of my little brother and I've punched him so many times.

  • But can I just get warm? I've got money.

  • Bedewcrock

    Seconded.

  • adam

    only white people are not punchable, i guess.

  • Berry

    "You're black, he's probably already scared of you."
    "Yeah, but you're gay and chubby, he'd never see it coming."

    Too soon?

    PS. How is Brad/Damon Wayans Jr. not impossible to punch? Explain that to me?

    PPS. I wasn't sure how to spell chubby, so for some reason decided it was a good idea to google "you're gay and chybby." At work!

    PPPS. Disqus may be annoying, but the ability to delete a post that went to a wrong place totally rocks!

    ETA Although I still meant that as a response to lowecase_ryan or emmalita and not adam, but oh well. Not deleting again, and you can't make me. So there.

  • lowercase_ryan

    black people are scary and therefore unpunchable by default.

  • emmalita

    Steven Colbert says so.

    http://www.colbertnation.com/t...

  • That's Arya's secret weapon. Sidles up to your complacent self with the least punchable face in Westeros then *BAM* stiletto of MURDER right through the neck.

  • Juxyn

    I would punch Annie Edison.
    On her lips.
    With my lips.

  • emmalita

    The header picture is actually the most punchable photo of Jason Segal. Science.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Well, Marshall skews the scale of punchability because he hangs out with the second-most punchable face on TV.

  • King Push

    NPH?

  • L.O.V.E.

    NPH is the most Slappable face on TV.

  • Bert_McGurt

    You kidder.

  • King Push

    why everyone gotta hate on my boy ted

  • mairimba

    Cause he has the John Mayer douchey smirk.

  • Guest

    psst.. *whispers* That's not Jim Harper.

  • WhoDeyKY

    Andy Dwyer FO SHO. I wonder though... will his new super hot bod up the punchability factor? Who am I kidding....tiny puppy shoes!

  • elviscostelegram

    I would punch Jim Harper.

  • I want to punch Jim Harper's face so hard.

  • WineAndPop

    Yeah, he is exceedingly punchable. Glad I am not the only one who came down here to share this desire.

  • Modernlove

    Oh, cool. John Gallagher with a beard and a puppy. Glad I don't need my ovaries, as they have now exploded.

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