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Terror Ranking the Top 10 Irrational Fears We've Gotten from Movies

By Cindy Davis | Seriously Random Lists | July 8, 2013 | Comments ()


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The other night I was closing the blinds of our bathroom window as I do every evening at the first sign of darkness, and I had a little chuckle over it—and some of my other rituals that all seem to stem from movies and not, you know, any logical reason. Be that as it may, I shall do these things forevermore. That bathroom window is low; right next to the toilet, and one of my greatest fears is that a face will pop up against the glass while I’m sitting there. If I have to take out the trash and it’s dark outside? I run. There is a lot of exposed glass at my house, so either blinds or curtains must cover the glass at night, or I just stay the hell away. And I will never not be on the lookout for a shark when I’m swimming; if the water is murky, I take a quick dip and I’m out. Now, I know you’re not sitting there laughing at me, because you have your own silly fears…like my friend who recently confessed she won’t look into mirrors at night. Because lookout, the killer is right behind you!

Don’t be shy, share your illogical fear.

10. If You Go Outside Alone at Night, Someone Will Jump Out of the Tree-line to Murder You.

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9. If You Don’t Check the Back Seat of Your Vehicle, You Will Be Attacked by a Person Lying in Wait.

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8. Never Park Next to a Van (or Help a Stranger Load Something into Said Van) Lest You Be Kidnapped.

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7. Leaving a Knife on the Counter Means It Will Be Used to Kill You.

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6. If You Bend Over a Sink to Wash Your Face or Spit Out Toothpaste, When You Stand Straight Again, You Will See Your Killer in the Mirror—Right Behind You. (Alternate Method: You Open the Medicine Cabinet. Close It and See the Killer).

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5. Someone Is Waiting Behind a Door to Kill You.

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4. Any Exposed Glass Will Allow Someone to Peek in at You or Jump Through the Glass to Get You.

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3. You Will Be Knifed to Death While Showering.

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2. If You Pick Up a Hitchhiker or You Hitch a Ride, You’ll Be Tortured and Killed By a Homicidal Maniac. (There’s a 0.0000089% chance [approx. 22 per year] of being killed while hitchhiking.)

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1. Being Eaten Alive by a Shark. (2011 Worldwide: 17 Fatalities; 118 Reported Attacks, 2012 11 Fatalities; 102 Reported Attacks from SAF)

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Cindy Davis, (Twitter)would never run to hide in a closet or under a bed.



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Comments Are Welcome, Douches Are Not


  • JBolivar92

    Beware the random cat! A garbage lid falls in the moonlit alley, or a dish breaks in your dark kitchen, there's a rattle in the closet... you grab whatever is closest to defend yourself (aluminum bat, a frozen leg of lamb, perhaps a lead dildo) and creep....towards....the sound.... OHMYGOD!-you clutch your heart, and then shakily exhale with a weak laugh, "it's only Puddins (Tabby, Tigger, random kittles)." You foolishly let your shoulders sag with relief, drop your weapon and/or turn your back and WHAM! The killer revs his chainsaw/ hacks through the closet door with a cleaver/ the violins start to crescendo....

  • Geena Phillips

    After I saw Jaws as a kid, I had trouble swimming in INDOOR POOLS.

  • Stofjas

    My brother was bitten by a ragged tooth earlier this year. Some damage to his leg and an op to repair the ripped achilles tendon later and he is fine. Good news for me, statistically this means that the chances of me being bitten by one while surfing is now basically nil.

  • Jezzer

    Waking up in the middle of the night to see a shadowy figure standing in my room.

  • Maguita NYC

    I had that happen often... Until I realized it was my robe hanging on the back of my shut bedroom door.

  • Bodhi

    Edit: Holy shit, this turned into a novel.

    When I was a kid I, after my dad tucked me in & read me a few chapters of Nancy Drew & checked my closets for evil dolls (sometimes I made him wrap up my dolls & stuff them in the far corners of the closet), I used to jam myself up against the wall & build a stuffed animal barricade between myself & the door to my bedroom.

    My grandparents lived in a house that my grandfather built by hand. It was utterly terrifying for many reasons, but mostly because the second floor was never finished. The walls were framed, but never insulated or drywalled. It was like that for 60 years, There was one room that was finished & that is where my cousins & I slept when we stayed over. We had to walk past a vast, dark expanse full of creepy shadows & windows just to go pee and, for a long time, my uncle had a HUGE stuffed gorilla in one of the alcoves.. :shudder: My cousin & I used to sleep in the same bed, back to back till I was probably 14.

    Years later, my husband & I moved into the house to work on it. Only the downstairs had HVAC so my dad & husband rigged a trapdoor over the stairs to keep the cool air down. (Apparently they had this set-up when my dad was a kid & slept in the terrifying dark space :shudder:) I liked to leave the doors & windows open because the house caught great breezes, but every once in a while the wind would catch the trapdoor & BANG it open. The first time it happened I sat on the couch for an hour & finally made my big dog come with me to investigate.

    The house also has the only basement I've ever heard of in coastal SC & it is a straight up serial killer basement. My grandfather worked at the Navy yard for 50 years & would come home, shower in the basement (there is a totally scary shower & it was the ONLY shower until my husband & I moved in), & then come in & kiss his wife & kids.

    I think I believe in haunted houses, but I don't think this is one of them. My grandparents worked HARD while they were alive & I like to think that they chose to go ahead & rest after they died. We lived there for 2+ years & did a LOT of work on the house, plus we made our son there. Terrifying as that house will always be, it will always be home.

    I grew up on the coast & my dad & I went to the beach almost every day after work/school. I love the ocean & swim out as far as I can, usually scaring the hell out of my dad/husband/friends. I swim & swim & then am positive that I'll be eaten by a shark. I love the feeling of being our there all by myself & then I freak the fuck out & swim//flail til I hit the shore

  • cheryl88

    My mom took me to lots of horror movies when I was a little kid. I loved, loved, loved them. Then we went to one called "He Knows You're Alone." If memory serves, it has a very young Tom Hanks. What did stick with me (so to speak) about the movie was that a woman got stabbed through the metal back of her movie theater seat. I couldn't see another horror movie at the theater for years... and I *still* check to see who's behind me when I go see a movie. If I don't like the look of them, I move.

  • I can't look into drain holes in the street. I KNOW there's gonna be a clown there one day and I will die.

  • I have to triple-check that the doors are thoroughly locked each night. I am terrified at the idea that someone will just break in and kill me in my sleep, for no damn reason.

    Also: the shower. I can't close my eyes in the shower. I'm convinced someone will be there when I open them. Brr.

  • Bodhi

    I ask this with all seriousness: How do you wash your face? I can't ever get it all off with the wipe things & washing off eye makeup seriously stress me out

  • Oh I just do it SUPER quickly. And every time I'm sure those ten seconds will be enough for the killer to get in.

  • Made me simultaneously terrified of sewers and clowns: http://collider.com/wp-content...

    (On the upside, Futurama has done wonders for curing my fear of the underground. Things don't look good for my fear of clowns.)

  • GODDAMMIT WHYYYY.

  • lostboy408

    Stopping for a second near a drainage ditch will result in a circus clown popping up offering you balloons and eventually eating you.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    All of these are valid fears. ALL OF THESE.

  • Robert

    Now hang on. #9 is an old urban legend.

    I'd propose an immediate substitute of "You will be murdered from within your dreams" or "You will be murdered by an otherworldly being who can attack you through a mirror." Those come from films, not urban legends.

  • apsutter

    Yes, but then it was subsequently featured in the movie "Urban Legends." And I think it might have also been used at some point in the I Know What You Did Last Summer franchise.

  • e jerry powell

    3) Only if you look like Janet Leigh (or Anne Heche, in a pinch).

  • You know what f*cked my sh!t up when I was a kid? Damn "Pee Wee's Big Adventure" and "Twilight Zone: The Movie". That Large Marge, "Wanna See Something Really Scary?" B.S. stuck with me... I'd be riding in the car at night with my Dad or someone else I trusted, and I would suddenly be terrified that I'd look over at them and they'd have transformed into something horrible.

  • apsutter

    I love TZ but that movie freaked me out as a kid. And it freaks me out even more as an adult after learning of all the people who freaking died making it.

  • e jerry powell

    That particular bit was the least of it for me. I still fast-forward through the "A Quality of Mercy" segment of that movie. I just can't watch it.

  • Frankly, I'm all in favor of shutting your blinds/drawing the drapes/whatever at night, and it has nothing to do with murderers. I'm amazed that people leave their blinds open after dark.
    People, *everything* you do is observable. You've basically chosen to live your life as a zoo animal if you don't draw the curtains. Neither my neighbors or the random hobo walking down the street needs to know where I am and what I'm doing in my house at night.

  • Nyltiak

    Dark rooms with mirrors will always wig me out. The only mirror in my bedroom is the lid of my jewelry box and it gets closed at night. I've been known to drape towels over mirrors in hotel rooms. If I catch sight of a mirror and it's dark, my brain starts thinking about Bloody Mary, and then I can't decide if just thinking the name is enough, and then I wig out and have to turn all the lights on.

  • annie

    Growing up in Appalachian Ohio/West Virginia, I was always convinced while driving through the hills, I'd come around a bend and see a woman in white in the middle of the road. Thanks especially to Supernatural!

    One of my nursing instructors is constantly dropping things (not her keys, as she'll need those to get away) near her car in the parking lot so she can make sure no one is hiding underneath it to grab her ankles.

  • apsutter

    I always have to check the backseat of my car. Especially if it's nighttime and I was parked in a new or strange place.

  • BuffyloGal

    If your friends split up while at a party at a lakeside cabin or in a forest setting, don't be the couple who go off to have sex. And don't be the dick who says something to frighten the others 'cause you may lose your head.

  • AshBookworm

    Luther and Hannibal have both left me terrified that there might be a creepy serial killer under my bed.

  • Tinkerville

    Paul F Tompkins has an amazing comedy bit about the mirror thing. It's hysterical. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

  • apsutter

    I fell into the Paul F Tompkins section of youtube for hours because of this video. And thank you very much for sharing it! I love stand-up and was well aware of who he was but never actually listened to his comedy because I didn't think he'd be very funny. I was proven very wrong while I was laughing so hard I put myself into a coughing fit.

  • Tinkerville

    He's one of my all time favorite comedians and so I try to share his stuff as much as humanly possible since I think he's vastly underrated. Happy to help! "Impersonal" is my favorite album of his if you feel like checking out more of his stuff.

  • apsutter

    Alright so I've been listening to him all day and I loved Freak Wharf but I think my favorite album is Laboring Under Delusions. The entire damn thing is hilarious. Love his job at the beta video store and the guy who slept through Best Week Ever and called him Mr Hutchinson lol

  • Tinkerville

    The thing about Matt Damon and the gelatinous cube just slayed me. Also, treat yourself to this bit of brilliance from him.. I have no idea why I laugh so hard every time yet here we are. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

  • apsutter

    Haha..love it. It's funny that he had a bit about best week ever because I used to watch it every week and I remember how they changed the format and literally didn't say a god damned word about it. So I'm sitting there thinking wtf? Poor Paul...they basically just threw him into the deep end and shrugged.
    Love how he's trying to play a prank on weird al by just yelling "Weird!!" at him. Of course Al would take it seriously. He's like the nicest celebrity alive.

  • apsutter

    I already downloaded his stuff lol...I cant believe I didn't listen before because I'm always looking for new comedians

  • oilybohunk7

    If I'm anywhere where I can feel the floor move I panic. I spend the entire time imaging it collapsing and my slow, bloody death. In these scenarios I envy the people below the balcony, floor etc. because they probably wouldn't see it coming and would die quickly. If I go to concerts at the Fox Theater in Detroit I CAN NOT be in the balcony because it sways and vibrates up and down like a mofo. Just typing about it made my stomach drop.

  • Az

    Look under the bed, look under the bed, LOOK UNDER THE BED. Because if you let a foot or a hand dangle. SOMETHING WILL GET YOU. Oh and CLOWNS. TERRIFYING.

  • apsutter

    My boyfriend HATES when I get hot and put a leg or arm outside of the blanket. One time I was like 90% asleep and had my leg out and I felt him oh so slowly pull it back under the covers and then cover me up but I was too sleepy to say anything. Then in the morning I remembered it and called him on it and now I love teasing him about monsters under the bed lol

  • Aaron Schulz

    Im so afraid of sharks that even if im playing a video game and am swimming underwater i am personally terrified the entire time that a shark will eat me. Im from minnesota and live in chicago, ive never seen the ocean, but sharks are still and always will be nightmare fuel.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Don't forget that if you are watching sharks on TV as long as your feet are OFF THE FLOOR you will be safe. It has always worked for me.

  • Aaron Schulz

    I usually have something on top of my head for it, i assume im below them and they will drag me further down, but a pillow stops all shark bites.

  • apsutter

    I always hated the parts in Tomb Raider where you have to swim in the ocean and sharks are a damn near constant threat. My heart would be pounding so freaking hard and I'd be yelling at Lara to swim faster!

  • BabyBearStrikesAgain

    You think this is funny. I get it. Make fun all you want.

    But for those of us with very active imaginations these are real conditions. To the point where some of us had a hard time being home alone in a large house for years...and are possibly, maybe, sorta still afraid of the dark. Being scared and/or paranoid all the time sucks.

  • apsutter

    I have always had the feeling of being watched. I grew up in a beautiful log cabin but we also lived in the middle of the woods and were surrounded by complete darkness at night. I think it was the amount of different terrains surrounding the house that freaked me out. In the front we had these HUGE windows that took up the entire face of the house(plus they were ginormous and oddly shaped so we didn't have any window coverings) and they faced woods and I was always freaked out about people being in them and watching us. Then on the right side of the house we had a huge pond and more woods and the pond would look so creepy in the moonlight. The back of the house (my room) faced the pond, woods and looked out on acres and acres of farmland and we could actually see the lights from my high school which was miles and miles away. So creepy because I always had a thing for zombies and I always imagined them slowly coming towards the house and being able to see thousands of them in those fields.

    One night, like the morons we were, my little brother and I decided to watch The Ring all alone while our parents were on a date. That movie fucked my shit up! We were terrified and sitting tensely on the end of my bed the whole time. Well when she came through the fucking tv my little bro fell off the bed and we both leapt to the back of my bed in abject horror. Then we refused to alone the rest of the night and when he had to use the bathroom I helped him check it out by putting the shower curtain up etc lol. We still talk about how much that movie freaked us out

  • Bodhi

    This. As a kid, I went through periods where I had weekly panic attacks. Being shipped off to Girl Scout camp for weeks at a time didn't help them

  • annie

    Oh, no. This is not funny. This is very real terror.

  • Guest

    Thank you for adding the sharks! To get killed by shark is possibly the most irrational fear (in a statistical sense, at least) we have.

  • Edwina the Magnificent

    I always, ALWAYS have to look behind the shower curtain before I sit on the toilet. No way in hell is some maniac going to take me out in the midst of taking care of business. Instead I'll piss my pants and stab him with a toothbrush.

    Also, I had managed to mostly get over the monster under the bed thing. Now however, if at some point in the night I stick a foot out from under the blankets, my cat immediately appears out of nowhere and starts chewing on my toes. There's the barest hint of breath, a tickle of whisker and then chomp! In the split second before I'm fully awake, I'm once again four years old and my stuffed animals have finally arisen to eat me alive.

  • WeeeeeDC

    Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.

  • stinkyziti

    The shadow that you see in the corner of your eye is actually The Slender Man coming to take you away...
    No wait that's just my personal fear

  • Anna von Beav

    I cannot go in a lake, ever ever ever never. Since 1980.

  • Bea Pants

    Samesies with caves. The Descent could have had no monsters and still have been utterly terrifying to me.

  • Some Guy

    I agree. I thought they should have made the movie about the girls getting physically stuck in a narrow passage. That scene in the beginning before the typical monsters in waiting converged where they are crawling through the suffocating tunnels was far worse than anything else in the movie for me.

  • Torgo

    For 3 weeks after seeing that movie, I kept picturing those guys climbing up my ceiling.

  • Alex0001

    Arachnophobia actually gave me a fear of spiders....

  • ,

    Nobody on a soap opera ever checks to see who's standing behind the door (even when there's a knock or the bell rings) or the curtain or in the next room, and it's ALWAYS the person you least want to overhear what you're saying, or to know who you're with.

    People in soaps act stupid and deserve every bad thing that happens.

  • KittySnide

    If I sleep facing the wall a mutant cannibal man will appear behind me and stroke my hair (thanks, The Hills Have Eyes).
    also in highschool I would turn my television to face the wall before bed, lest I give Samara a chance to escape it and attack me.

  • BLA

    Ever since I was four or so years old, I haven't been able to sleep while my fingernails were exposed. I either tuck my hands under a pillow, the sheets, or make a fist to cover them.

    After seeing "the Fly" at much too young of an age, I turned the scene where he picks off his own fingernails into a nightmare where he would come for me while I was sleeping and pull mine off too.

    Seriously, don't ever let kids that young watch anything terrifying. They won't even be able to appreciate the half-naked Goldblum that comes along with it.

  • apsutter

    Dear lord...The Fly!!! I didn't see that movie until I was an adult and my bf was utterly shocked because I love movies like that. I have never seen a movie be so utterly disgusting, terrifying, and freaking heartbreaking all at once. I still feel like they perfected gross out horror movies in the 80's and we've yet to better upon it.

  • melissa82

    If I hear a noise and somehow will myself to check under my bed then see nothing, there will be a troll/clown on my bed when I sit back up.

  • melissa82

    (is it weird that Ernest Scared Stupid is partially to blame for this? First movie my little sister and I were allowed to see in the theaters by ourselves.....during the credits I wanted to leave I was so terrified. I was 17. Kidding...9, sister 8 - thanks Mom. Way to send the girl who couldn't handle Monster Squad to see a movie about trolls while you watched Prince of Tides or something)

  • Bert_McGurt

    Nope, not weird. That damn movie was pretty terrifying.

  • Nnaysayer

    After seeing The Hero and the Terror as a little girl (thanks, Dad!), I avoid the stalls nearest air vents in public restrooms. Lest a serial killer crawl out and Chuck Norris not be there to save me.

  • ,

    And I will never not be on the lookout for a shark when I’m swimming; if the water is murky, I take a quick dip and I’m out.
    ---
    You'd take a dip in murky water? Jesus Christ, woman. I wouldn't kiss you with Dustin's mouth.

    Look, I have a friend who's a lifeguard at a municipal pool, and one night at a bar she spent some time telling me horrifying things about the job ... and the water.

    Two words: Code Brown

    Think about it: They never drain the entire pool anytime someone Caddyshacks, do they? No. Only in "Caddyshack," and that was Only A Movie.

    No. What they do is, they dump more chemicals in, wait 6-12 hours depending on the severity of the Code Brown, and then ... Everybody back in the pool!

    So you go right ahead and take a quick dip if you want. I will never stick a tongue in your mouth or a toe in a pool (or any ocean, either, because, you know, horseshoe crab shit) again, and I will enjoy ruining the experience for everyone who raises the subject with me for the rest of my natural life.

  • Quatermain

    Eh. I don't go to public pools, but that's because I don't like crowds or children. I'll swim in anything else, though. I've swum in the Mississippi and Missouri rivers and in both the Pacific and Atlantic oceans.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    That's one of the reasons why I don't go swimming anymore.

  • schic1418

    I can't leave my bathroom door open at night because of my irrational fear that something will crawl out of the drain and kill me. And after seeing Chucky when I was only 6, I still walk past vents more fearfully than reason should allow.

  • Maguita NYC

    I keep the shower curtains open. Unless I have visitors. INVITED visitors.

  • NateMan

    Keep it open then too. The little show you put on might encourage the guests to protect you from BLOODY MARY.

  • Maguita NYC

    As long as they're protecting me from... Not offering me in sacrifice to, I'll flash and even Flashdance for them!

  • schic1418

    I also have an irrational fear of children's toys, particularly dolls, also music boxes, because I'm afraid they'll start playing or making whatever noise they make without being wound up, which means I'm about to die.

  • Bea Pants

    I have the same fear of those cymbal banging monkeys because of the Stephen King story in which something terrible happens every time that monkey gets going.

  • Maguita NYC

    Check your walk-ins and broom closets before going to bed after watching Hannibal.

    I am that wimpy.

  • Erin S

    Call it paranoia, but I feel like the van one makes sense. And it's less from movies (although Silence of the Lambs/Ted Bundy certainly leave an impression) and more from an extremely blunt father.

    Vans were a no-no, and we were told from a young age that if someone in a parking lot or other public place said "Come with me or I'll shoot you," then we were to tell them "Fine, shoot me." As a child this seemed horribly insensitive and horrifying to tell a little girl to essentially play Chicken with a kidnapper ("He won't do it, because he knows he'll get caught if he does,") but as an adult (who has watched her share of Law and Order:SVU,) I know that his fear was that we would be caught in a situation much worse than a shot to the head. Thanks Dad!

  • Captain_Tuttle

    It's not paranoia, and it's a perfectly rational fear. That's exactly what Ted Bundy used to do. He'd pretend to be hurt (usually a broken arm, or on crutches), and ask for help. People have a natural tendency to want to assist someone, so it was a great move, serial-killer success-rate wise.

    The thing that sucks is that it makes me wary of helping anyone - especially if I'm alone, and especially especially if I'm with my kid. It's tough to model good samaritan behavior when I'm (perfectly rationally) afraid that the person in need of help is going to hurt me.

  • blacksred

    everyone thinks that i am a horrible person because i have always maintained that if someone ever jumps out in front of my car while driving i WILL keep driving and speed up so whatever is chasing that person doesnt get me too. I am fat do you know how many sandwiches i would make?

  • oilybohunk7

    This was my thought too, I don't think that fear is irrational at all.

  • dizzylucy

    Yeah, I can't argue much with that one either. My friend and I always referred to windowless vans as "kidnapper vans".

  • Bodhi

    We called them Chester vans

  • Jane

    If you sit on the edge of the bed with your feet on the floor, someone will slice your Achilles tendon.

  • apsutter

    My bf is dying to get a modern be frame that sits on the floor and I was TOTALLY on board just because of this and well, monsters.

  • hippyherb

    Lack of storage space and a genuine fear of something under my bed is why that area is always full.

    Also, I cannot sleep with my wardrobe doors open.

    "Sam Winchester: When I told Dad I was scared of the thing in my closet, he gave me a .45!

    Dean Winchester: Well, what was he supposed to do?

    Sam Winchester: I was *nine* years old! He was supposed to say "don't be afraid of the dark!"

    Dean Winchester: Don't be afraid of the dark? What are you, kidding me? Of course you should be afraid of the dark. You know what's out there!"

  • Bea Pants

    BTW this is also true of open staircases. It is some kind of miracle that I didn't fall and break something dashing up and down our basement stairs as quickly as possible throughout my childhood.

  • mats19

    seriously! this has terrified me for years so much so I had to get built in drawers under my bed to ensure NOTHING was under there. As a kid I used to lay awake at night not wanting to get up to go to the bathroom bc I could have sworn something was under there waiting to grab me and cut me.
    Cue horror at one of the Hannibal stories of the week was about under the bed attacks... gave me the freaks for a week.

  • Rocabarra

    One of the few instances where being a poor student who can't afford a bed frame works to my advantage. Box spring straight on the floor - no boogey men OR dust bunnies to worry about!

  • Bea Pants

    I would leap from my doorway to my bed to avoid walking near the edge (I had a pretty small room).

  • dizzylucy

    Me too. Thanks a lot, clown under the bed in Poltegeist.

  • mats19

    I used to dream about ways that my bed was like a high tech safe room (similar to a dr. venture esque hidey hole room) to "protect me" from things under it... my childhood pysche really couldn't handle under the bed horrors.

  • Bea Pants

    I still have trouble sleeping if I'm not under a mountain of protective blankets. I just got so used to sleeping completely burrowed with just the tiniest portion of my face poking out for air. Between that, my chronic sinus problems and apparently restless legs I am a real peach to sleep next to.

  • TraceAndM

    It is a scientifically proven fact that a would be murderer is easily foiled by a protective layer of heavy blankets. They walk in the room, you're under a flimsy sheet? DEAD. They walk in, see that heavy quilt? MURDER AVOIDED. I honestly don't know why more people don't understand this. This is also why I keep my apartment freezing so sleeping under a mountain of blankets is comfortable year round. For safety, people.

  • emmalita

    I really believed this for a couple of years when I was a little girl.....living in Texas.....in an unair-conditioned house.

  • Mariazinha

    Oh God, this!!!
    I'm certain someone is waiting to pull me under the bad, or will grab my feet while I'm lying down.. UNLESS I am covered... It can be as little as a sheet, but if my feet get uncovered someone will grab me!!

  • Or pull you under the bed and maul you

  • ,

    Something under the bed is drooling.

  • Bea Pants

    I still get legitimately nervous when standing near the edge of the bed, especially if I'm home alone. If something terrible actually does grab me or cut me I will probably die of a heart attack before it can do anything to awful to me.

  • Bea Pants

    If you are investigating a strange noise and the cat leaps out of some nook or cranny to scare you, you will breathe a sigh of relief or grumble "stupid cat," and then immediately meet your gruesome end at the hands of the knife/axe wielding maniac.

  • Some Guy

    Or alien star-beast.

  • NateMan

    And that's why you grab the cat by the tail and flail it about your head. Best case scenario, the serial killer gets a face full of seriously pissed-off cat. Worst case scenario, the cat learns to not jump out at you. Either way you win.

  • Maguita NYC

    This reminds me of Horrible Bosses with the damn cat jumping out of nowhere all the time.

  • John W

    #11. Being subjected to an Adam Sandler movie while on a non stop flight from NY to LA.

  • emmalita

    I'm not sure that's so much an irrational fear as it is dreaded torment.

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