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Pajiba's 100 Most Prolific Commenters of 2011

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Miscellaneous | Comments (85)

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I know I say it every year, but I don’t say it often enough: I fucking love you people. And by “you people,” I mean all of you, and especially the commenters, who not only add a tremendous amount of comedy, brilliance, and profundity to the site, but you keep our asses in check. You can be irritating, you can drive us to hair pulling, but you are also the fuel that drives this place. We hook them, you reel them in. And you are the best the Internet has to offer.

Every year, we also like to thank our most prolific commenters. Obviously, a mere mention is not enough to show our enormous gratitude, but it’s the best we can do, I’m afraid. I realize there are lots of places for you all to share your thoughts and witticisms, but I appreciate that you still make time to share them with us. As I’ve said before, you folks have got a sizable audience: A huge number of our readers — and we now count about 1.3 million visitors a month — read your words, your thoughts, your one-liners, and your deranged lunacy. It’s a huge part of the experience here. I don’t know what we did to deserve you all, but sincerely, honestly: Thank you. I say that on behalf of the entire staff, and on behalf of the thousands of readers who come here for you, who many of you have met off-line, and some of you have even forged real-life and lasting friendships, hook-ups, and romances. Thank you so fucking much for another terrific year, and I hope you can continue to make time for us again in 2012.

1. Mrs. Julien
2. figgy
3. PaddyDog
4. ,
5. Socrates_Johnson
6. RobP
7. logan
8. Protoguy
9. MM
10. DarthCorleone
11. Paultera
12. Jay
13. superasente
14. Fredo
15. MelBivDevoe
16. BarbadoSlim
17. BWeaves
18. Three-nineteen
19. Pookie
20. Robert
21. Anna von Beav
22. TylerDFC
23. The Wanderer
24. Slash
25. Jerry
26. idleprimate
27. mrcreosote
28. Todd
29. snapnhiss
30. Uriah Creep
31. bleujayone
32. klingonfree
33. zeke the pig
34. admin
35. branded
36. kirbyjay
37. Nadine
38. googergieger
39. Julie
40. BierceAmbrose
41. Kballs
42. DeistBrawler
43. coveredinbees
44. Even Stevens
45. John W
46. Craig
47. Cindy
48. haplo
49. Samantha T
50. sars
51. ChristianH
52. John G.
53. cinekat
54. duckandcover
55. KatSings
56. Groundloop
57. Patty O’Green
58. grace b
59. Scully
60. splinter
61. Ian
62. Forbiddendonut
63. The Mutt
64. Mel C.
65. tamatha
66. Wednesday
67. Sara Tonin
68. mswas
69. Sean
70. Tracer Bullet
71. Lauren
72. Carrie
73. Candee
74. OldSchool60
75. gp
76. Snuggiepants
77. MRod
78. Reba
79. Lucas
80. Simon
81. D-Day
82. denesteak
83. Pinky McLadybits
84. Matt
85. FabMax
86. becks
87. Rest In Peace
88. Markus
89. idiosynchronic
90. Ender
91. Junierizzle
92. jM
93. beet salad
94. Lindsey with an ‘e’
95. Uda
96. lubeg
97. Samantha
98. pissant
99. Stinky
100. NateS1973










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Comments

After learning last year that I commented enough to have actually written a full-length novel, I vowed to ease off a little. So 13th, huh. Let's shoot for 20th next year.

Posted by: superasente at December 29, 2011 12:03 PM

So, if I post a comment here, will that bump me up to #16?

Posted by: BWeaves at December 29, 2011 12:05 PM

Screw you all. I save my most fabulous comments for Pajiba Facebook. Burn in Hell!!! wheres my Gin!

Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at December 29, 2011 12:15 PM

Gorram real frakkin' job. Took me off the list for the first time in years. I CURSE YOU! I NEED MORE FUCK-OFF TIME FOR MY PAJIBA-SICKNESS!!!

Posted by: dammitjanet at December 29, 2011 12:16 PM

This list has 100 people on it. Can I be the least prolific?

Posted by: Brian at December 29, 2011 12:17 PM

Skitz isn't even in the top 100? He must have the record for EE appearances per comment.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at December 29, 2011 12:19 PM

#14? Moving up the charts.

Goal for next year: break into the top 10! DarthCorleone, comin' at you, bro!!

Posted by: Fredo at December 29, 2011 12:20 PM

Clearly, I need start commenting less. It can't look good. Thank Godtopus you didn't post the actual number of comments like you did last year, though.

This probably didn't help my cause...

Posted by: RobP at December 29, 2011 12:23 PM

YES! YES! 83! I...really need to comment more. After all, you people deserve as much of me as you can get. Take that as you will.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at December 29, 2011 12:24 PM

From 19 last year to 93 this year. Man, I may need to get back in the game.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at December 29, 2011 12:34 PM

Not even on the list. Rassin-frackin' meatspace real life job.

Posted by: Meander at December 29, 2011 12:35 PM

Optimus, Skitz has his own goddam thread devoted to him.
I wouldn't waste the tears. Soon he'll be in the e-Smithsonian.
As for me, I definitely gotta up my game.
I'll be in the e-toilet.
Actually, I just chose to be judicious in my commenting this year, waiting until I had absolutely nothing at all to say and then blurping out banalities of the highest order. Although I did EE one week, so I'm happy.

Posted by: Odnon. at December 29, 2011 12:37 PM

Rassin-frackin' meatspace real life job.

Yes. This.
I'm trying to get a raise at work, and it's seriously cutting into my Pajiba-time.

Posted by: superasente at December 29, 2011 12:45 PM

The

Posted by: Greedy at December 29, 2011 12:46 PM

#15? Egads. I'm not sure if I should be pleased or if I should get a life.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at December 29, 2011 12:47 PM

year

Posted by: Greedy at December 29, 2011 12:47 PM

is

Posted by: Greedy at December 29, 2011 12:48 PM

I had hoped to make it on the list this year. I guess I just didn't spend enough time in internet land, which is strange because my real life is very empty. I should have been able to find the time. I have no one to blame but myself.

Posted by: Freller at December 29, 2011 12:48 PM

not

Posted by: Greedy at December 29, 2011 12:48 PM

over

Posted by: Greedy at December 29, 2011 12:48 PM

yet.

Posted by: Greedy at December 29, 2011 12:49 PM

I'm surprised as hell. Those others people must really be slackers.

Posted by: Jay at December 29, 2011 12:49 PM

I blame my absence on the following ten items:

01. Uh...
02. Hold on...
03.
04.
05. Okay, it's just that I've um...
06.
07. Shit.
08. No, not as in actual shit, it's just...
09. ...
10. Goddam you, Zuckerberg.

Posted by: Skitz at December 29, 2011 12:51 PM

Let this be a lesson to all you suckers who work for a living, wastin all that time earnin money and contributin to society and junk.

Posted by: protoguy at December 29, 2011 12:57 PM

Jeez i didn't know this would be used against me later! I have a job now so I am posting less. The problem is under control I swear it!

Posted by: logan at December 29, 2011 1:04 PM

Hi. I'm Casey Kasem. And welcome back to Pajiba Top 100 of 2011.

As we continue the countdown, we have a smart-mouthed, displaced New Englander with a penchant for over-caffeinating himself and bringing an oversized Mag-Lite to movie theaters to deal with obnoxious audiences. Going up on the charts from #63 last year, all the way to #31 this year, here is bleujayone.

-Wow, I cracked the Top 40.

I feel like Hall & Oats.

Posted by: bleujayone at December 29, 2011 1:04 PM

28? Jeez, either I'm posting a lot more than I realize, or other people aren't posting as much as I thought.

Posted by: Todd at December 29, 2011 1:04 PM

Yay! This year also marks the first time I've met some of you in real life, and the year of the billion weekend Hang Outs that validated the existence of Google+. I love it here.

Posted by: KatSings at December 29, 2011 1:05 PM

Number 9... Number 9...

I'm just so glad I'm not number one. It truly is a dubious distinction. (But of course it's Mrs. Julien, and I wouldn't trade a single one of her comments.)

Posted by: MM at December 29, 2011 1:08 PM

I feel like Hall & Oats.

But which one are you: Hall, or Oates? IT'S IMPORTANT!!

Posted by: MM at December 29, 2011 1:11 PM

This is why I love to hang out here. :)

Posted by: Bob Frapples at December 29, 2011 1:11 PM

This brought me back to theater try outs in high school.

Didn't make this list either.

But I DID win my first EE this year. So suck it bitches! Not quantity, QUALITY!

(flips the bird)

Posted by: scorzi at December 29, 2011 1:11 PM

#85?

I didn't think I'd make it at all. I'm finally part of something. *sniff*

Posted by: FabMax at December 29, 2011 1:13 PM

Sigh. A 7% drop from last year. DAMN YOU WORK FOR KEEPING ME BUSY!!!

Posted by: Scully at December 29, 2011 1:16 PM

For all your emergency Hall & Oates needs dial 719-266-2837 to reach Call & Oates! Press extension 4 to hear "Private Eyes!" [clap clap] They're watching you!

Posted by: superasente at December 29, 2011 1:22 PM

Wow - from almost missing the list last year to Top 20 this year. That is a major... um, I guess I'll say improvement.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at December 29, 2011 1:23 PM

I never seem to be able get out from under admin, which is frankly suprisingly given how syrup-coated that man is.

Posted by: branded at December 29, 2011 1:23 PM

Fuck "," Fuck them right in their ass.

Posted by: Juicy Weatherbee at December 29, 2011 1:24 PM

This is just the wake up call I needed. You think you have some control, that you'll evaluate every comment before posting, but then you get caught up in the rush and you find yourself saying things like "PICTURE HOT BOY AWSOOOME eekkk111!!!!111" and pretty soon you're spewing nonsense daily. DAILY. It's unacceptable. I promise next year to only contribute Human-Centipede-song level comments. Only quality, literate . . .

OOOoohhh, I'm next to Tracer! HOW YOU DOIN', BABY?

Posted by: Lauren at December 29, 2011 1:32 PM

Holy Shitballs! I really need to step up my game, y'all. Prepare to be blown away by my fancy phraseology and elegant locution in 2012.

You asked for it.

Posted by: miss kate at December 29, 2011 1:42 PM

Well if you hadn't deleted half my #@&€ing post, I might of had a shot. Fascists.

Posted by: Blake Shrapnel at December 29, 2011 1:43 PM

Hmm. Clearly I've got work to do. :)

Posted by: Samantha at December 29, 2011 1:48 PM

This is the best place on the internet. Well, actually, Wikipedia is, but this is second.

Posted by: pissant at December 29, 2011 1:53 PM

Where's the shout out to the little guys? You know, the ones who have jobs/lives who can't post on every article written on this site. I'm not bitter or anything, but if something happens to the Top 100 don't look my way. And those freshly dug holes...oh those are just my dogs being dogs.

Posted by: Dingle Berry at December 29, 2011 1:55 PM

It's "might have".

Posted by: Jay at December 29, 2011 1:58 PM

Woooooooo!!!

#74 rules!

[Once again, I have no life.]

Posted by: OldSchool60 at December 29, 2011 2:11 PM

...also, I didn't realize breaking the top 100 would be so easy.

[You can achieve so much, when you're unemployed.]

Posted by: OldSchool60 at December 29, 2011 2:14 PM

#48....what? no, there's nothing wrong with my eyes. it's the sand..from the wind..from the..oh, shut up!

Posted by: haplo at December 29, 2011 2:15 PM

#75!! suck it #76 through everyone else!

Posted by: gp at December 29, 2011 2:32 PM

Awwww, crap. First I forget to submit my top books for the Cannonball post, and now I don't even crack the top 100 commenters. It's not my week, Pajiba-wise.

Posted by: Captain Tuttle at December 29, 2011 2:34 PM

FWIW, you can have a job and still end up in the Top 10. Hell, you can have multiple jobs, as long as they allow for time spent on the Internet.

It's the having-a-life quotient that'll keep you out of the list entirely.

Posted by: RobP at December 29, 2011 2:42 PM

Where's the shout out to the little guys? You know, the ones who have jobs/lives who can't post on every article written on this site. I'm not bitter or anything, but if something happens to the Top 100 don't look my way. And those freshly dug holes...oh those are just my dogs being dogs.

Posted by: Dingle Berry at December 29, 2011 1:55 PM
__________________

I'm with you dingle berry, where's the love for the lurkers who randomly post bullshiznit that apparently is not funny or prolific, huh????

I am including myself in that mix, I don't think I have enough snark to cut the mustard I'm afraid.

Posted by: NGG at December 29, 2011 2:49 PM

My goal was not to be number 1 this year and not have my 2+ novel's length worth of comments counted for length on the site. Mission accomplished.

Posted by: Robert at December 29, 2011 2:55 PM

I hereby graciously renounce the throne.

Hail, Mrs. Julien! Long may she reign! God save the queen!

*cues up the Pistols*

Posted by: , at December 29, 2011 2:59 PM

I'll crack the top 50 next year, Gadget. NEXT YEAR!

Posted by: ChristianH at December 29, 2011 3:00 PM

Also, I attribute my 19 place drop to a period in which I needed to GTFO of internet threads for fear of losing my sanity (not to mention a few too many unpleasant run-ins with fellow Pajibans). Now, my system's been cleansed, the site's better (and less dickish) than ever, and I can get back to my rightful place.

Posted by: ChristianH at December 29, 2011 3:04 PM

Woohoo! Pulling in at last place!

It's an honor just to be nominated, etc.

Posted by: NateS1973 at December 29, 2011 3:06 PM

I need to work more diligently. Maybe I'll have my brain steam-cleaned. Efficiency's sake, you know?

Posted by: Jerry at December 29, 2011 3:15 PM

Despite not cracking the top 100 I enjoyed looking at the list and seeing so many familiar names. Thanks for making this year happy reading all the comments you wasted so much time posting. Can't wait to see how you waste 2012!

Posted by: El L Cool J at December 29, 2011 3:28 PM

I am deeply shamed by this recognition. Not enough to shut up, but deeply shamed nonetheless.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at December 29, 2011 3:32 PM

#69. Somewhat flattering. Giggity.

Posted by: Sean at December 29, 2011 3:45 PM

#77 present.

My New Years resolution will be not to comment while I am drunk, it will be hard, but a comment should at the very least kind of make sense.

Mock and droll people, mock and droll.

Posted by: MRod at December 29, 2011 3:59 PM

@Lauren: Hey, girl.Why don't you come on 'round here and take a ride on the Bullet Train?

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at December 29, 2011 4:31 PM

I might be a semi-prolific member here but I'm like that strange woman you might see in the grocery store mumbling to herself while she angrily gesticulates at the cat food. You pretend she's not there while you laugh nervously behind your hand.

Posted by: snapnhiss at December 29, 2011 5:05 PM

Wow. I'm with those surprised to have made the list. But unlike those blaming jobs for their lack of posting...the only reason I did post so much was because I've been desk-jobbing since April.

Whee. I almost feel like I matter here. :)

Posted by: Sara Tonin at December 29, 2011 5:11 PM

I think the shame makes the posting hotter. I mean if it not shameful why post at all? It would be like sex without the spanking.

Posted by: logan at December 29, 2011 5:58 PM

#52!

well, I guess that's still a passing grade.

Posted by: John G. at December 29, 2011 6:01 PM

Ha! Top ten four years in a row. I am approaching official spambot status.

Posted by: PaddyDog at December 29, 2011 6:09 PM

Hooray! I made it to #23!

Posted by: The Wanderer at December 29, 2011 6:14 PM

I remember when I was shocked to be number 50 back when the list only went to 50. Dustin had to confirm it was me. Oh, how we all wish I didn't TL:DR all over the place into the Top 20 year after year.

Posted by: Robert at December 29, 2011 6:29 PM

If wanting to be on this list is wrong, I don't wanna be right. . I didn't think I had a shot. I'll take #91 and wear it proud.

Posted by: Junierizzle at December 29, 2011 7:25 PM

I reckon if you didn't count posts discussing "Game of Thrones", "Walking Dead" and the ass of Odette Yustman, I wouldn't be on this list. Not even close.

To thine own self be true...

Posted by: ForbiddenDonut at December 29, 2011 8:08 PM

So... this list reads as a congratulatory list of douches. Well done, us.

Posted by: snapnhiss at December 29, 2011 8:52 PM

I guess we don't play this game anymore but Ass of Odette would make a great band name.

I'll show myself out.

Posted by: No Pithy Name at December 29, 2011 9:06 PM

I'm all about quality, not quantity....actually I'm too lazy to comment all the time....

Posted by: Rubble44 at December 29, 2011 9:41 PM

Fuck "," Fuck them right in their ass.

Posted by: Juicy Weatherbee at December 29, 2011 1:24 PM
---
Whoa, whao, hold on juuuuuust a minyte there. What did I do? Hell, I thought I took the year off, had like 12 comments at MOST. Is that all it takes to make the top 5 these days? Pssssshaw.

Also, I believe more Lindsey with an 'E' would result in world peace.

Get on it, girl.

Posted by: , at December 30, 2011 1:55 AM

"36"

My age?

My boob measurement?

My swinging hips?

My house number?

The number of Dummar children by the year 2020
(accounting for multiples)

Half the number of days Kim K's fake marriage lasted?

Hell no! My number on the Pajiba Prolific 2011 list.

YAY ME!!!

Posted by: kirbyjay at December 30, 2011 7:53 AM

Since I'm pretty sure I commented all of about 30 times this year (and therefore, fully did not expect to be on this list) I am calling the rest of you slackers. Slackers I say!

Also, I kind of love it that I probably made it on this list simply from commenting on CBR posts, specifically the instances where I had to chastize people for being jerks to a Cannonball reviewer (but I think that only happened twice).

Posted by: tamatha at December 30, 2011 2:34 PM

Oh, you do just fine as you are, Scully.
Don't be so hard on yourself.

By the way, what's for dinner tonight?
You bring the recipe, I'll bring the chef's hat.
(PLUS, I'll wash the dishes.)

Posted by: Mulder at December 30, 2011 10:43 PM

Screw you all. I save my most fabulous comments for Pajiba Facebook. Burn in Hell!!! wheres my Gin!
Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at December 29, 2011 12:15 PM

^ this.

2012 is mine.

Signed,
#54

Posted by: duckandcover at December 30, 2011 10:52 PM

what is this pajiba facebook thing?

Posted by: logan at December 30, 2011 11:02 PM

DUDE. Duuuuuuuuude. I thought I'd been so quiet this year. How many of mine contained the word "HAAAAMMM!!? I bet like...98%

DUUUUUDE. Numbah 2!

Posted by: Figgy at December 31, 2011 1:19 AM

I don't know how to feel about this one. Second year in a row I made this list. But I feel as disconnected as ever, and it's always my fault. I've considered shutting up a few times, but I have an opinion on everything and can't resist throwing it at other people when the opportunity arises.

But I feel that way about a lot of things.

Posted by: Lucas at December 31, 2011 6:00 AM

Ah yes. A self congratulatory commenter list that I can do well on!

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at January 2, 2012 11:24 PM

I have never been so simultaneously proud and ashamed. I got screwed out of my office job in the middle of November and have no time to really be on Pajiba during the crucial commenting hours anymore. I'm only even on Facebook through my phone if I happen to find time during breaks.

I'm proud that I miss this place. I'm ashamed that had I been able to comment for that one last month, I may have taken an extra place or two.

The shame and pride could possibly be reversed. I'm not sure. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE! SOMEONE GET ME MY DESK JOB BACK SO I CAN SURF THE WEB AND GET PAID!

Um, I mean...whatever. Meh and so forth.

Posted by: Paultera at January 5, 2012 10:40 PM