McConaughey, Lovable, Affable Nutjob, Has, I Sh*t You Not, Started Writing Rap Songs

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McConaughey, Lovable, Affable Nutjob, Has, I Sh*t You Not, Started Writing Rap Songs

By Joanna Robinson | Miscellaneous | November 14, 2013 | Comments ()

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In an interview with GQ this week, Matthew McConaughey says “of course” he still plays the bongos naked. Shine on you crazy diamond. Better still, he confesses that he keeps a list of “aphorisms, bumper stickers, truths and rhymes.” Things he’s seen around town? Sure. But also ones he’s cooked up for himself. AND LATELY HE’S STARTED WRITING RAP SONGS. I know. It’s a dream come true. Here’s the sample he gave GQ:

“Rollin’ through yellow lights on my skateboard/ Kiss the fire and walk away whistling’.”

WHEN, WHERE, HOW CAN I SEE A MATTHEW MCCOUNAGHEY RAP BATTLE?! With a stoned Woody Harrelson on accompanying bongos? Please?

The whole interview is filled with this sort of charming nonsense and accompanied by some curious photos where they’ve appeared to style McCounaghey as a 50s screen star? Like, is he doing James Dean here? Not great. You keep getting older, Matt. You’re not staying the same age. All right? All right.





(I would loved to have been the photographer who said “Matt? How about in this one you hook your thumb awkwardly in your waistband? Just to maximize the awkward? Yes. That’s it! HOLLLD IT!”)


(Seriously, go experience the whole mad thing for yourself.)

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Az

    Omigod those stumpy t-rex arms of his are fucking mesmerizing. Like a car wreck.

  • WillSmithSpreadsAids

    A yo be on da lookout for that new McConaughey mixtape droppin summer 14' y'all. My man done slayed dragons, stripped for da ladies, AND did that laywer shit yo! Now, he bringing that southern heat in a mixtape with nothing but BARS. By da country but made for da streets! Mixtape's called A Time To Kill This Rap Shit ya heard!

  • BlackRabbit

    He likes big bongs and he cannot lie.

  • First thought: "Shirt Off Your Shoulder"

  • Mrs. Julien

    That's quite a preponderance of toothpicks for so few photos.

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    Craft services only had corn on the cob and treacle.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Hmm. The hair and eyebrow coloring are too dark to be ideal McConaughey.

  • J4Sho

    Is it inappropriate to say that with that toothpick in his mouth he looks like he's fellating a teeny tiny penis? It is? Okay....I won't say it then.

    I'll just say I don't find this guy at all sexy.

  • the dude

    Come on, the James Deen thing still works for him. But obviously, we already have the half-assed clone, James Franco.

  • Bananapanda

    You mean half-assed clown.

  • Ian Fay

    How did GQ get him to wear a shirt for 5 whole pictures?

  • BlackRabbit

    It's just a tearaway shirt for emergencies. If he's being overwhelmed, RRRIIIPPP.

  • Ian Fay

    So, McConaughey = hipster Hulk Hogan?

  • Mrs. Julien

    Free pot.

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    Why don't you have more upvotes for this? Brevity of wit should be rewarded. So often I just have massive word walls.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Never mind the brevity, I thought the notion of free pot would garner more upvotes.

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