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Scientists Have Discovered the Key to a Successful Relationship, But There's a Catch

By Dustin Rowles | Social Media | February 22, 2016 |

By Dustin Rowles | Social Media | February 22, 2016 |


The Wall Street Journal is reporting on a study expected to be released later this month by the Journal of Sex Research that scientists have figured out what makes a marriage continue to tick long after the honeymoon period is over. Unfortunately, it’s more of an observation than it is a solution.

In a wide-ranging study with a huge sample of 40,000 married or co-habitating couples, the Journal discovered that the couples who are happiest after five years of marriage or more are the couples of who still liked to bone with regular frequency.

An overwhelming majority (83 per cent) of respondents recalled being sexually satisfied in the first six months, but this dropped down to around half for couples who were talking about their current sexual satisfaction.

However, a total of 79 per cent of men and 81 per cent of women who were satisfied told researchers they had sex one or more times per week. (via The independent)

The catch, of course, is that most couples probably won’t be that too into having sex at least once a week if they are unhappy, while couples that are happy with one another are likely to have sex more frequently. It’s a chicken-and-egg situation.

There are other factors, of course. For women, sexual satisfaction depended on frequency of orgasms, mood setting, and communication, in that order. For men, it was mood setting, sexual variety, and communication (presumably, the orgasms were a given for men).

In other words, if you want a long and happy marriage, find someone, marry them, wait five years, and if you’re still having sex at least once a week, there’s an 80 percent chance that you’re happy in your marriage. If you’re not still having sex more than once a week, throw him or her back and try again with someone else. Rinse, repeat, die.

Also, fuck like there’s no tomorrow, even if it means getting backdoor banged by grunting, heavy-breathing Robert DeNiro against a granite counter. ROMANCE.

Source: WSJ