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How Bad Is the Crypto Crash? Bad Enough that Matt Damon Is Trending on Twitter

By Dustin Rowles | Social Media | May 12, 2022 |

By Dustin Rowles | Social Media | May 12, 2022 |


I’m not going to lie; I don’t know anything about the crypto market. I spent an hour trying to make heads or tails of it this morning, and it’s sort of like trying to understand what someone is saying to you in a foreign language. I don’t understand all the words, but I can read facial expressions. I can see anguish. You don’t need to understand crypto-bro speak to understand panic.

Here are a few sentences I ran across this morning:

— Cryptocurrency trading platform Coinbase has lost half its value in the past week, including its biggest one-day drop to date on Wednesday.

— More than $200 billion erased from entire crypto market in a day

— While Bitcoin was down 13% over the past 24 hours, Ether, the second-largest crypto, dropped 23% … A brutal selloff in cryptocurrencies has seen some $600 billion in digital asset market capitalization wiped away in a week. (In November, Bitcoin was worth $67,553; now it’s worth less than $30,000).

— Dogecoin price is on the verge of a 70% downturn (I recognize “Dogecoin” is the currency that Elon Musk was going to allow Twitter users to use on the platform).

— Bitcoin’s 50% crash erases all of Elon Musk’s gains on Tesla balance sheet

Mostly, though, I know that crypto is crashing for two reasons: 1) Because Ben McKenzie — the former O.C. star who has launched a second career as a crypto skeptic — is making jokes:

… and 2) because Twitter is mocking Matt Damon, who was featured in a crypto ad that aired during the Super Bowl. This year. Three months ago.

It’s probably just a market correction. I’m sure things will be better today!

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