True story: In late 2006, I was at LAX, and saw a slightly small-ish man in dark sunglasses sprint- walking through the terminal. As he approached I realized it was Lars Ulrich from Metallica, and that he’d accidentally dropped something out of the back pocket of his bag. A woman nearby grabbed the item (a small pad of paper, I think?), and ran after him to return it. As she got closer she said, “Excuse me, sir?” At which point Lars whirled around shouting “No autographs!” Surprised, the woman cautiously returned the paper and walked away. Lars shoved the paper into his bag, and continued through the terminal.
It was a perfect moment.
I have never had all of my feelings on a person I’d never met so spectacularly confirmed. Luckily for Metallica, Lars has either developed a sense of humor about himself or their combined efforts convinced him to make this brilliant ESPN commercial. I still think Lars is a humorless sack, but at least his seems to be relaxing into his sack-titude.