It took the Oscars longer than usual to come around to choosing a host for the 2019 telecast, and when they finally landed on someone, it was Kevin Hart. But Kevin Hart had some shitty tweets, and instead of simply apologizing for the shitty tweets, Kevin Hart quit. And then he apologized. Because when you’re defending your own homophobia, you gotta show some pride. I guess?
I don’t know why some people find it so hard to apologize.
Anyway, the Oscars didn’t have a Plan B, because one has the impression that Kevin Hart was their Plan B, because Ellen or one of the Jimmys probably turned them down, and their Plan C was probably Ricky, which would’ve been even worse than Kevin.
So, rumor has it now that the Oscars may go with … no host. None. Zero host. From Variety:
“They’re freaking out,” said a top comedy agent, speaking on the condition of anonymity. There were no contingency plans in place by the Academy or broadcaster ABC, according to another insider. The show’s producers are back to square one …
Another option being tossed around is not having any host at all, but rather “a bunch of huge celebs, something ‘SNL’ style, and buzzy people” to keep the show moving, the insiders said. A stunt like a group monologue was floated, one source added.
On the one hand, having no host is kind of rotten, because it means none of the incredibly qualified people who do not have a problematic history will get a crack at it, and it’s a terrific platform. On the other hand, maybe it’ll work. Maybe it will be quicker paced. Maybe the Oscars can avoid criticism by not giving them a target to criticize.
Personally, I think the best idea is to cancel the Oscars, and in its place, have Billy Eichner randomly show up to all the nominees’ front doors and inform them while they’re in their pajamas if they won or lost, and then edit their reactions into a three-hour show.
In either respect, the Board of Governors is expected to make a decision tonight about how to proceed.
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