"St. Lamentine’s, Nay!" Highlights from NBC's Thursday Night Comedies
We’re back! And just in time for a night of Valentine’s Day-themed episodes. “Parks and Recreation” actually had the best one, but it aired last week. (Ann, that beautiful spinster, actually went on a date with Tom!) So this week, no real show was the winner, but one man does deserve all the Tommy Bahama shirts we can send him: Florida Stanley. Let’s begin.
“30 Rock,” “Hey Baby, What’s Wrong?”
I know I’ve been harping on this for a while now, but Liz really is in a rut. She made some progress in her own way in this hour-long episode, realizing that often, she is the biggest obstacle to her happiness. But is sticking with Criss really the right answer? Lemonheads are starting to doubt her. The rest of storylines were a bit … off. Jack wanting to sleep with Avery’s mother was disturbing, and the typically lovely Mary Steenburgen felt out of place. Jenna had the usual amount of great lines — a real Jiumph — but her and Pete’s bit about her inability to sing felt forced, as did the Lutz plot in which he went after “low-hanging fruit.” And Kristen Schaal’s stalker turn? Could be funny, but it even felt too absurd for the “30 Rock” world. After a streak of solid episodes so far this season, this was a disappointing entry.
- “Mommy-Daddy Sheet Monster Time”
- Liz: “Never? Not even during the ‘Love Boat’ reunion?”
- Jack: “Boomerang my Sheila back to her Joey, mate!”
- Old Man at Ikea: “I’m going back to those cute bowls!” Old Woman at Ikea: “I swear to God I will stab you!”
- Lutz: “So tense … just like my Mom’s back.”
- Tracy: “Let’s prepare for the adventure of a lifetime! Then after we watch ‘Fievel Goes West,’ we’re gonna get you some action!”
- Jenna: “Actresses? Where? How young are they? I’ll do nudity!”
- Transylvania U.N. Guy: “Vampire push.”
- Dr. Spaceman: “It’s funny. If those teeth were in your vagina, you’d be considered a monster.”
- Kenneth: “You don’t think I have dreams? Last night, I dreamed a baby ate my hair.”
- Hazel: “Your hair is so bouncy, like the after-photos in a lice ad!”
“The Office,” “Special Project”
Well, we all saw this coming. That Bitch Kathy has been eying Jim for a while, and now that she’s on the team with him headed to Florida for three weeks, she made it clear in a phone conversation to a friend she intends for them to hook up. The potential affair, or any kind of dalliance, has been hinted at with Kathy’s interest in Jim. But if anything happens? I’m setting my TV on fire. I agree with Courtney that “The Office” already should have ended its run. Let’s not make this worse by wreaking havoc to the Halperts. Erin’s claim that she wouldn’t be returning from Florida came as a surprise and sets things up for Andy to be able to make a heroic gesture to get her back to Scranton. Yes, let’s stick with the pleasantness, writers. We already have the potential drama of Dwight perhaps being the father of Angela’s newborn. No Kathy home-wrecking allowed.
- Darryl: “I can’t tell if it’s a ‘We’re just friends’ beanie, or an ‘I’m hot, you’re hot, let’s get it poppin’ ’ beanie.”
- Darryl: “Wow, it’s like the Nation of Islam down here.”
- Dwight: “Andy just gave me a chain with three weak links. Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have. And now I no longer own an Arctic wolf.”
- Kelly: “You wanna call someone that texted you? Do you want to drive them away?”
- Kevin: “Sometimes, Batman’s gotta take off his cape.”
- Stanley: “If anybody’s going to Florida, it should be me. Every shirt that I have that isn’t a work shirt is a Tommy Bahama. I’m the only person in this office who watches ‘Burn Notice’!
“Up All Night,” “Day After Valentine’s Day”
Jason Lee needs to become a series regular. He’s adorable, his Kevin helps balance out Ava and the two of them make a nice balance for Chris and Reagan. “Up All Night” is cute, but just less so than “Parks and Rec,” making it great for those who can’t stomach Ben and Leslie. (And to those people, I say, you are soulless.) Chris and Reagan’s failed attempts at grand gestures to express their love for each other may have been predictable, but that doesn’t mean their make-out session in the rain to Phil Collins wasn’t greatness. And to make sure your Friday is great, too, here’s said song, embedded for your pleasure. It may turn you into a Kissing Bandito.
- Ava: “I bought a spatula today! I pranced around my kitchen like Doris Day in my apron in one of the movies where my husband is clearly gay and I have to pretend not to notice, and this is all I get?”
- Ava and Reagan: “No one likes flan.”
- Ava: “Lose my 212 cell phone number!” Kevin: “Lose my AOL address!”
- Chris: “Although, before I pack it all back in, it is Valentine’s Day.”
- Reagan: “So does the Hep C come with the tattoo or do you have to pay extra for that?”
- Julian: “Oh, to be the food going down your food tube.”
- Reagan: “Stop saying ‘tag.’ OK, stop saying ‘Banksy,’ honey.”
Sarah Carlson is busy downloading the Major League soundtrack. She lives in Texas now.