Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Dustin Rowles | TV | May 3, 2026
Cold Open — This week’s cold open had two things going for it: Colin Jost doing a better than usual Pete Hegseth (less drunk jokes, more roasting) and Aziz Ansari doing a absolutely fantastic Kash Patel. “I’m a trailblazer. I’m the first Indian person to suck at their job … I proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that we can be just as incapable and incompetent as the whites.” (Score: 7 out of 10)
Olivia Rodrigo Monologue — Have I mentioned that I saw Olivia Rodrigo and Chapel Roan in concert? It’s a good brag with the 8th graders. She gives a very good monologue — just exudes charm. And she does a rendition of “Driver’s License” about getting her RealID. Good start. I hope the writers don’t let her down. (Score: 7.5 out of 10)
Edge of Destiny — It’s an ’80s soap opera where everyone overacts and Rodrigo’s character pushes the characters down a very, very long flight of stairs. Pretty good. (Score: 6.5 out of 10)
My Room — A pretape song (and a very good one, at that) about a girl who lives in the perfect ’90s bedroom … except she’s a girl in a zoo on an alien bug planet. (Score: 7 out of 10)
Lava Cake — Another iteration of the ShopTV segment where someone sells something that looks … delightfully inappropriate. This time? A cake with a, uh, starfish hole in the center of it. It’s a lot, and so wrong. And Mat: Here you go. Skit of the week. You’re welcome. (Score: 8 out of 10)
Ex-Boyfriend — Here’s an Ashley Padilla joint, where Ben Marshall tries to make his ex-girlfriend jealous by pretending to be on a date with Padilla’s character with disastrous consequences in the way that only Ashley Padilla can do. (Score: 6.5 out of 10)
Weekend Update — Solid “Update” tonight, too, with a ton of groaners (e.g., the Michael Jackson joke), Veronika Slowikowska and Chloe Fineman as Alix Earle and Alex Cooper discussing their beef, and Kam Patterson trying to shoot his shot after Megan the Stallion and Klay Thompson broke up. Maybe Patterson is catching on. (Score: 7 out of 10)
Busted — Rodrigo and Hernandez et. al sing an odd song about catching each other cheating. Ummm. When an episode is going this well, the energy saves even the lesser skits. (Watch Here) (Score: 5.5 out of 10)
Rasta Driver — Two girls in the back of an Uber are as taken back as the driver when he spontaneously realizes that he’s a brilliant white rasta singer. Andrew Dismukes is very good in this. Poor guy. (Score: 6.5 out of 10)
Home Security System — The problem with home security is that they capture the burglar’s face, but they’re not always easy to identify. That’s why this home security sends a TikToker to every burglary so that the video goes viral! Smart. (Score: 6 out of 10)
Verdict — Not quite as good as the Ryan Gosling episode, but definitely a top three episode of the year (also, Deborah Harry and Connor Story introduced Olivia Rodrigo’s musical performances).
