Finn Wolfhard Falls Hard as Host of an Unimpressive 'SNL'

Cold Open — We’re back, and James Austin Johnson’s Trump impression is back, too, and he’s bringing his cabinet of curiousities, including a new JD Vance (Jeremy Culhane), Ashley Padilla as Kristi Noem, and the only one of the impressions that’s still funny instead of deeply depressing, Colin Jost’s Pete Hegseth. Otherwise, the Cold Open feels too much like the news these days. (Score: 4.5 out of 10)

Finn Woolfhard Monologue — Of all the Stranger Things stars, I’m not sure why they they choe this guy (Joe Keery, Sadie Sink, or Maya Hawke would have been my choice, but I am not Lorne Michaels). He jokes about growing from a child actor into an adult on screen and brings out two of his ST co-stars (Gaten Matarazzo and Caleb McLaughlin), who likewise grew up on camera. Gen Z may like the monologue. Gen X thinks it was, “eh.” (Score: 4.5 out of 10)

Snackhomiez ft. Finn Wolfhard and A$AP Rocky — This is the one where they all use a lot of incoherent Gen Z slang and talk about snacks. They brought in the reinforcements, too: A$AP Rocky and Sabrina Carpenter. Doesn’t save it, but again, probably will be a hit with the younger generation (that probably doesn’t watch SNL, but will see it on YouTube). (Score: 4 out of 10)

Heated Wizardry — Aside from an unexpected appearance from Jason Momoa as Hagrid, this Harry Potter/Heated Rivalry is exactly as you might expect, only somehow even less inspired. (Score: 4.5 out of 10)

Boy Band — Wolfhard plays a kid who wants to go on tour with his “indie” band but needs the blessing of his father, a former Boy Band member. It does not go well, although there’s one amusing moment when Ashley Padilla (who plays the Mom) slaps Finn for correcting her about the Pixies. It’s going to be a rough show. (Watch Here) (Score: 3.5)

Stranger Things Spin-Offs — A preview for all the upcoming spin-offs. Every show gets a character, the ninth episode is real, and one show is just an extension of that never-ending coming-out scene. It’s a little amusing for ST fans, which this episode of SNL clearly assumes everyone is. (Score: 5 out of 10)

Weekend Update — “Update” is fine this week (a good “protein” joke and a winning groaner about a stiff wind that needs to be seen), but at least we’re back on familiar ground here. Jost tosses in an amusing ferry joke and a good ScarJo joke at his own expense. Meanwhile, I had to look up the meme that Jane Wickline’s segment is based on — some TikTok thing where a woman said she was going to have one button for every day of the year so she can keep track of time. It’s kind of funny. I guess? (watch here) Kam Patterson’s Michael Irvin impression may be the best thing that Kam Patterson has done on SNL, so far (a very small sample size). (Score: 6 out of 10)

Space Emperor — This is a good use of Wolfhard. He plays a Space Emperor trying to bark orders and make grand pronouncements, but his sidekick keeps feeding him things so he can’t get a word out. It’s semi-amusing (although, more fun watching Wolfhard try not to crack). This is the Mat sketch of the week because he doesn’t watch Heated Rivalry. Yet. (Score: 5 out of 10)

Guy’s Girl — Wolfhard plays a character who brings his girlfriend to a guy’s hangout, and she’s a “guy’s girl,” which is to say: Veronika Slowikowska basically plays a character from Tires, but not her own. (Score: 5 out of 10)

Alex Honnold Free Solo — SNL actually has not yet given an embed for this one. For good reason. MIkey Day’s Alex Honnold and some rando named Reggie talk about scaling a skyscraper. It is not funny, but it is the only live sketch I remember seeing Sarah Sherman in tonight, if you’re wondering where she is. (Score: 1 out of 10)