Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Andrew Sanford | TV | November 29, 2023
Lockdown taught me a lot about myself. I learned I can get good sleep if I have nowhere to be. Writing in bed makes it easier to nap when you’re done. Last but not least, I love Guy Fieri. This was a monumental change for me. I made fun of donkey sauce like everyone else. When a Flavortown restaurant opened in Times Square, I lamented its existence. I mocked the man’s frosted tips and laid-back, chill af persona. A lot of that changed in May of 2020.
Like most of the world, I was trapped inside my apartment, wondering if I should bother bringing children into this cold, uncaring world. Then, I saw news of a bowling shirt-clad savior with a hunger for life. A man whose energy and uncontrollable vibes had seemed alien to me before. That was my fault. I did not understand what Guy Fieri was offering. He set up a food truck outside a hospital and handed out food to frontline workers. At a time when I lusted for kindness, I saw this cool dude dishing it out.
When my kids were born, The Food Network became a regular staple in my home. It was easy to watch at a time when our attention spans were spread thin. This allowed me to fall further in love with this bleached blonde bloke. I marveled at Guy’s Grocery Games as the eponymous host cheered on a slew of professional and amateur chefs. Divers, Drive-ins, and Dives is a show where he highlights small businesses and tells them to keep being rad. It’s fantastic.
The Food Network has offered their homegrown star a $100 million contract to keep him on board for three more years. As reported by Variety, the star is loved by Warner Brothers Discovery. He’s created and hosted a score of shows for them since 2016. The man hosted the after-party for their upfronts last year. That makes a lot of sense if there’s anyone with a “let’s hang” aura strong enough to make even David Zaslav feel human for a few hours. Speaking of which!
Yes, I have seen the photos of Fieri with TFG (whiplash much?). I don’t know him personally, so I can only say so much in his defense. I’m sure someone will dive into the comments with a milkshake duck-like explanation as to why my Fieri love is misguided. My hope is that he’s the kind of guy who absorbs all types into his orbit. Who wouldn’t want to hang with a man with such effortless confidence? Maybe he really respects the position of President? I don’t know. I only know what the Mayor of Flavortown has shown me: How to love life like there’s no tomorrow. As evidenced by this clip of him rocking the f*** out to Rage Against The Machine.
