“There is a reason it didn’t work out between you and me. But it’s not Germany. It’s Robin. She is so much bigger in your world than you realize and this thing that you’re all doing— you and Barney and Robin— where the three of you hang out at the bar, night in, night out, like you’re all just buddies, that doesn’t work. Trust me. I’m right about this.”
“And sure enough, she was right. It didn’t work. We just didn’t realize it yet.”
We’re three episodes into this season of “How I Met Your Mother.” And I’ve come to one absolute conclusion.
They are trying to kill me.
I’ve stated my position on Robin and Barney already. You guys know that I am firmly Team Swarkles. And, my fellow teammates, with this season placing Robin in the unrequitee Barney role from Season 4, this could be our year.
Or, it could not.
We learned at the end of last season that the as yet unseen groom at the mythical wedding where Ted meets “the mother” is Barney. Here’s what we know through various interviews with the creators:
- Barney is the groom.
- We do not yet know the bride, but will by season’s end.
- Barney does get married that day. There will be no The Graduateing.
- When we last left, the bride was requesting Ted’s presence.
It’s Robin, I say to myself, arms wrapped shoulder to shoulder, weeping softly. Obviously.
But here are the obstacles:
- Nora, because 2011 has been all about hot chicks of Middle-eastern descent totally fucking up couples people seem to enjoy on CBS sitcoms.
- Other various upcoming love interests for each respective character.
- Could it be too obvious? Too simple?
- The possibility of Ted/Robin Redux.
That last point brings us back to Victoria’s words to Ted at the end of this week’s episode, and SagetTed’s confirmation that she is, in fact, correct. So, could take this a few different ways. One, Ted and Robin give it another go. This would be horseshit. I love this show, and I stand among its most ardent defenders. But a Robin and Ted reunion would be a dirty drain circle, covered in hair and toothpaste remnants, and it would not recover. Two, and the general internet consensus, Ted and Robin have a “if we’re not married before 40” deal. As long as Ted has a future with his dream girl, he doesn’t need to find anyone else. It’s been six years, and he’s no closer to getting his shit together (not that marriage and family qualifies as “getting one’s shit together” but he’s no closer to his goal than he was in the pilot).
Someone or something in all this is a red herring. Be it Nora, be it the way Victoria worded her farewell, the wedding, the bride, the mother herself. We’re getting messed with in the best possible way. The show is already better than it’s been in two seasons. God, I hope it stays that way.
The show started with Robin for a reason. Ted met her, and that set his story into action. Robin is, one way or another, the endgame (but she’s not the mother, so don’t waste my comment space with that). Over the course of this and the next, the likely final, season, we’ll find out why.
Until then, we’ll always have this.