Navigating Twitter in the current social and political climate can be, to use a scientific term, shitastic. There are several ways to combat the horribleness or reality in your Twitter feed, like creating lists or being very selective about the accounts you follow, but that takes time and effort. Let’s be honest: we are a lazy people.
I’ve done the work for you in finding these novelty and just plain effing cute Twitter accounts for you to follow. Get them into your rotation and I guarantee your happiness number will rise. SCIENCE AGAIN.
Literally photos and video of goats all of the time. It’s goat for what ails you.
ATTENTION EVERYONE:— 100% Goats (@EverythingGoats) January 9, 2018
ive goat a stick pic.twitter.com/7tg8glIafv
GOAT MORNING pic.twitter.com/qilRqNCs46— 100% Goats (@EverythingGoats) January 2, 2018
You tweet a photo of yourself to this account and they match you with your doggelganger.
This account breaks down the hilarious and specific way German compound words are created and translated.
The German for starting and learning a new job & being treated less critically is Welpenschutz, or puppy-protection #NoWelpenschutzForTrump— The German For… (@thegermanfor) January 31, 2017
The German for the feelings of weary melancholy and sadness inspired by the reality of the world is Weltschmerz, which means world-pain.— The German For… (@thegermanfor) January 30, 2017
I don’t feel the need to explain this Medieval art to you, Warren.
"The floor is lava!"— Medieval Reactions (@MedievalReacts) December 15, 2017
- Everyone, Pompeii, 79 A.D pic.twitter.com/zR9J0mnFKp
When Jesus is about to be crucified but you got to get those merch sales pic.twitter.com/zHzP2Oput9— Medieval Reactions (@MedievalReacts) December 5, 2017
Thoughts from good boys and girls.
the human says. there are two options.. inside or outside. but if they would. elevate their mindset. they would uncover. a third option: stand. in the doorway. and sniff the air— Thoughts of Dog (@dog_feelings) December 7, 2017
the human. is hosting a get together. this evening. and my job. is to greet the guests. without jumping on them.. a nearly. impossible task— Thoughts of Dog (@dog_feelings) January 7, 2018
They’re good dogs, Brent.
This is Xena. She would like a peer-reviewed explanation on why you won’t let her eat the grass. Because she sure would like to. 13/10 pic.twitter.com/c59BhnQpAo— WeRateDogs™ (@dog_rates) January 16, 2018
This is Duncan. He was recently diagnosed with IMPA, which unfortunately doesn’t stand for “i must pet asap.” The disease has snowballed into a wide variety of complications, but Duncan has remained strong. He is 14/10 and u can help him by clicking belowhttps://t.co/GJefnVWgZ8 pic.twitter.com/WSA088sAoK— WeRateDogs™ (@dog_rates) January 12, 2018
Possibly the best way to read NYT right now. This account uses actual NYT text before scraping off all the context and creating something more poetic.
new career for a silver-haired, mahjongg-playing female retiree: running a cat-fighting ring. The “fighters,” however, stare at each other with scornful boredom, then leave— NYT Minus Context (@NYTMinusContext) January 17, 2018
Every so often an exceptionally capable woman has to prove her worth by competing against a clown— NYT Minus Context (@NYTMinusContext) January 15, 2018
It is what you think it is.
one time my dad won a free surprise dinner with darth vader and he wasn’t even grateful— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) January 16, 2018
rey i have learned the truth about your parents— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) January 10, 2018
i will be your father figure
put your tiny hand in mine
sorry there was supposed to be choreography here but we killed everyone else who was involved